BROOKLYN HERO WATCH: Man Kicked Off Flight for Saying 'Fuck'

You know what fucking sucked about 9/11? I mean besides 3000 dead, the dissolution of our civil liberties, and two wars killing a million people?

What sucked is that it put the airlines in this insanely abusable position of power; it put common American citizens like Flight Attendants on the front lines of Racial and Behavioral Profiling. On a WHIM, Ashley from Minnesota can make Orwellian determinations of who does and does not have the right to travel from state to state.

Fuck.

You better believe flight attendants and other newly-crowned princes of power are able to use that power however they want; even in retaliation against a customer that pisses them off -- and that's exactly what happened here.

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PRIME 6 PETITION TWO: ELECTRIC BUGABOO

God bless the fucking Internet, AMIRITE?! I would suck the internet's dick and let it shoot its load inside me.

I mean look: let's say you came across some blatantly racist whore, who needed to be schooled in an incalculable number of ways, but you knew that nothing you could ever do would teach her a lesson. The whole experience would leave you frustrated with the awful knowledge that she would never in a million years get what was coming to her!

But with the internet, you simply post about her on your blog that gets a million pageviews a month, and then BAM! Gawker, Gothamist, the NY Post, the Huffington Post, the Wall Street JOURNAL--all these fun-loving guys join in the fun, and pretty soon the entire tri-state area is calling her a cunt.

I wonder where she is, yaknow? Have you guys been thinking about that too? I want to see her reading all this press - I wonder if it's getting the message into her skull? Nah, it never does - I guarantee you she just just feels misquoted, maligned, and misunderstood.

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PRIME 6 PETITION: ANYTHING BUT HIP-HOP!

Sorry Park Slope: this is the kind of thing that makes me want to move to NJ and live in a white community that ADMITS they're racist.

Apparently this "petition" has been floating around facebook since yesterday; and I'm embarrassed to see that a few douchebags have actually SIGNED it.

The gist of it is that this retarded park slope yenta (non jewish? thank g-d) is trying to convince the owners of that new controversial bar on Flatbush, Prime 6, to "embrace indie music" instead of hip hop. If you read between the lines, the none-too-subtle message is that she'd rather have white guys in flannels standing around her patio than hard hittin' brothas with blow-torches and pairs a' pliers.

Boogity Boogity Boogity, Jennifer!!! The blacks are comin' and they're gonna GETCHA!!!

Brooklyn Nets! Hoo. Ha. Hoo. Ha. Say goodbye to property values! Here they come! Yo, Flatbush KFC is next son, HOLLA!

Clueless fucking cunt.

p.s. Check out vids of Jennifer's homies protesting shit at the Community Board meeting on Monday night here.

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BOD 4 GOD

Look sharp: This is the greatest thing Christianity has done since (TO-DO: Think of good thing Christianity has done.)

According to care2.com, the Journey Church (a "modern evangelical" church with a big fat location here Park Slope) is telling its members to lose some weight or go to hell.  

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PAVILION PRANKSTER

click to enlarge

Somebody is my fucking hero and I want to get their autograph.

This picture has been floating around facebook and email since noon yesterday. Apparently some disgruntled employee changing the marquis at the Pavilion Movie Theater put up "bed bugs," and then quit or was shit-canned.

If this story is true, this Pavilion employee makes the Jet Blue steward look like Dwight Muthafuckin Schrute.  

I left work EARLY just to see if I could get more flicks of this and ask questions - but by the time I got there, it was already gone, and the ticket clerk got red as soon as I said "bedbugs."  

"No, I'm sorry, the manager busy."