Park Slope Woman Decides It's Time to Play the Name Game

Photo via Dolce Vite

Sometimes you want to go where everybody knows your name. Sometimes, you decide that name you have just isn't working for you. Over the course of history, some of civilization's most important figures have changed their name and, as a result, have gone on to achieve greatness & stuff. It's like David Bowie sang to us back in the 70's..."Just gonna have to be a different man."

At the plucky age of 17, Allan Stewart Konigsberg found a niche writing jokes and became "Woody Allen."

At the ripe age of 24, Ferdinand Lewis Alcindor Jr. found Islam and took up the moniker "Kareem Abdul-Jabbar."

At the golden age of 32, Ronald William Artest Jr. found that he had punched enough fans and switched it up for "Metta World Peace"..."to inspire and bring youth together all around the world."

At the just-on-the-brink-of-middle age of 34, Park Slope resident Christina Summers found that it was time for a change. She needed to take her Italian hot chocolate business, Dolce Vite Chocolatto, to the next level. When its time to change, then it's time to change, jerks.

As such, Christina Summers is in the process of changing her legal name to PRINCESS CHOCOLATTO. Princess. Fucking. Chocolatto.

I'm sure she's a lovely lady. She wears a friggin crown of flowers for crissake. I'm certain I've seen her out somewhere & thought to myself "Wow. That chick looks cheery." I mean, I get it. In our Facebook-dominated world, we're all branding ourselves in one way or another. Still, I'm wondering how "Princess Chocolatto" will go over for her at age sixty. Will her name hang like an Iggy Pop tattoo? Probably. Hopefully the whole Italian hot chocolate thing works out for her. The name "The Woman Formerly Known as Princess Chocolatto" is a bit unwieldy.

via New York Daily News