Windsor Terrace Bar Name Gets the Tomahawk Chop

The Washington Redskins. The Cleveland Indians. The Atlanta Braves. All three are storied sports franchises that have existed for years with names that Native Americans kind of take offense towards. Aunt Jemima. Uncle Ben. Lucky from Lucky Charms. All three are mascots that have played off racial stereotypes for decades in the the interest of enticing consumers. In America, we're big fans of cultural appropriation.

Take Mohawk Tavern, a recently-opened bar over in Windsor Terrace from the same folks who brought you Park Slope's Skylark & Gowanus' Lowlands Bar. Over at KensingtonBK, a blog that I didn't know existed until coming across this story, they recently posted a short interview with the co-owners. It didn't take long for commenters to voice their opinion on the name, reminding us that the Mohawk people are a tribe of Native Americans who have already endured enough, including years of battles with alcohol addiction. They don't need some Brooklyn bar piling on by naming itself after the tribe.

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WE'LL BE MISSING YOU: NOTORIOUS BIG 14 YEARS LATER

Oh damn, today is the 14th anniversary of the shot heard around the world—AKA: Notorious BIG's death—and AOL has compiled a ridiculous round-up of celebs remembering Brooklyn's own Big Poppa. 

Diddy offers a relatively incoherant statement:

"It goes off in New York City. Like tomorrow everywhere, all the stations especially here. It's gonna be going hard in the paint on Biggie and then at night it goes down. Even throughout the weekend so it's really great when you wake up on March 9 and you just hear all his records and how up to date they sound."

Method Man "doesn't like death" (weird, because I love death):

"Big was a close friend of mine; I had a lot of fun with him working on the album... I didn't watch [the biopic Notorious] because I don't like death at all."

Jadakiss ruminates on how Biggie would have made turning 40 cool:

"He would have made turning 40 or turning 39 feel flavor, made people feel happy about turning 39 or 40, the same way he made fat dudes feel like they're looking fly ... and made ugly dudes feel like they weren't ugly anymore. ... He would have bridged the gap with the young guys."

GREAT, GUYS. What a tribute. 

Sky's the limit on BIG remembrance parties (see what I did there?), but we've heard of two that are definitely happening.  One is at Jennifer McMillen's house (invite only) and the other will be hosted at Prime 6, where they will demonstrate to their uptight neighbors that "mo money" really DOES equal "mo problems." 

All reports indicate that they have "the chronic by the tree."  WORD.   

PRIME 6 PETITION TWO: ELECTRIC BUGABOO

God bless the fucking Internet, AMIRITE?! I would suck the internet's dick and let it shoot its load inside me.

I mean look: let's say you came across some blatantly racist whore, who needed to be schooled in an incalculable number of ways, but you knew that nothing you could ever do would teach her a lesson. The whole experience would leave you frustrated with the awful knowledge that she would never in a million years get what was coming to her!

But with the internet, you simply post about her on your blog that gets a million pageviews a month, and then BAM! Gawker, Gothamist, the NY Post, the Huffington Post, the Wall Street JOURNAL--all these fun-loving guys join in the fun, and pretty soon the entire tri-state area is calling her a cunt.

I wonder where she is, yaknow? Have you guys been thinking about that too? I want to see her reading all this press - I wonder if it's getting the message into her skull? Nah, it never does - I guarantee you she just just feels misquoted, maligned, and misunderstood.

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PRIME 6 PETITION: ANYTHING BUT HIP-HOP!

Sorry Park Slope: this is the kind of thing that makes me want to move to NJ and live in a white community that ADMITS they're racist.

Apparently this "petition" has been floating around facebook since yesterday; and I'm embarrassed to see that a few douchebags have actually SIGNED it.

The gist of it is that this retarded park slope yenta (non jewish? thank g-d) is trying to convince the owners of that new controversial bar on Flatbush, Prime 6, to "embrace indie music" instead of hip hop. If you read between the lines, the none-too-subtle message is that she'd rather have white guys in flannels standing around her patio than hard hittin' brothas with blow-torches and pairs a' pliers.

Boogity Boogity Boogity, Jennifer!!! The blacks are comin' and they're gonna GETCHA!!!

Brooklyn Nets! Hoo. Ha. Hoo. Ha. Say goodbye to property values! Here they come! Yo, Flatbush KFC is next son, HOLLA!

Clueless fucking cunt.

p.s. Check out vids of Jennifer's homies protesting shit at the Community Board meeting on Monday night here.

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Millenium Part Deux: 'I'm Not A Racist, I Love Obama'

Last Monday night, as I was trying to scrub beet juice from my hands and take a stab at finding the kitchen countertop and finish an endless game of Egyptian Rat Skunk, my phone rang. It was a bass baritone reporter from WNBC-TV (whose call letters never fail to bring to mind Paul Giamatti in Private Parts). He wanted to interview me about the anti-apartheid rally over at John Jay and get a parent's opinion on the issues raised. And he'd read all the "level-headed" stuff I'd said to Park Slope Patch and on FIPS. 

Read: he needed some bloviator to go on camera and admit that no way, no how would they (me) send my little lily-white-tushed middle-schooler over to any of the schools currently housed at John Jay.

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