Miracle Grill Closing?

Hells to the yeah, according to OTBKB:

"I just heard from a very reliable source that Miracle Grill, the Tex-Mex restaurant on Seventh Avenue and 3rd Street, will be closing. Sunday is their last day. My source was  told by an employee at the restaurant."

Also, HOLY SHIT!: Bobby Flay was the original chef there??

Anyway.

I was always kinda meh about Miracle, though it def sucks balls if their shuttering is recesh related.

That's a pretty hot piece of real estate ass they've got though on that corner...if this shit is true, wonder who will take it over next?

Put Out, or Take Out: Istanbul Park

Behold: our new semi-regular video series, Put Out, or Take Out.

Here's the thing: we order out a LOT. And yeah, we obvs always do so with the intention of getting some really delicious food. But ordering out isn't *only* about the taste of your Kung Pao shrimp. It's also very much about whether or not the dude who answers the phone understands English and can properly take your order, whether or not your shit was packed up by a blind person, whether or not said blind person included chopsticks or plastic ware, or whether or not the delivery guy has a pen for you to sign your cc receipt.

Put Out, or Take Out aims to go deep down into the dark underbelly of Park Slope take out cuisine to uncover the cold hard facts of what goes down from the moment you dial the restaurant, till the moment you throw out all your leftover shit into the plastic bag, tie it up and leave it sitting on top of the garbage because you're too much of a lazy fuck to bring it down to the trash room.

We'll also have a group of rotating guests as we work our way through the nabe that will, hopefully, be way funnier and more entertaining than my ass is.

Restaurant reviews are a dime a dozen, but no one else ever tells you whether or not these take out joints actually put out...until now.

Ok, so a couple things to note:

Click to read more ...

You Know Who's *REALLY* Fucked in Park Slope? Anyone Who Works In A Restaurant Here

Apparently things are so jacked in our nabe, the NYS Department of Labor conducted a special investigation of 25 restaurants and coffee shops along 5th and 7th aves, and here's what they found: 23 of the restaurants were commiting "wage theft" and majorly fucking over their employees.

"In the vibrant Park Slope neighborhood, filled with writers, activists and growing families, we found that many of the bustling restaurants were staffed by workers who were paid grossly illegal wages." said Commissioner Smith. "This investigation shows that wage theft happens not only in dimly-lit factories or grim depressed neighborhoods--it happens everywhere. Even our very nicest neighborhoods sometimes have sweatshops on their main streets."

They go on to say:

"in total, 207 workers were underpaid more than $910,000. Some of the worst violations were for delivery employees working 60 to 70 hours per week and paid a salary of $210.00 to $275.00 per week. At one restaurant, workers were paid as little as $2.75 per hour."

Daym.

Needless to say, I'm curious as hell about which restaurants were included in this study (particularly the two that were actually in compliance).

In the meantime, I think this is a good opp to remind everyone to tip long and tip hard...this ain't Europe, people. When that delivery dude is biking his ass through the rain/sleet/snow to bring you your fucking spicy tuna and shrimp tempura rolls, he's expecting more than a $1 spot.

Also, Park Slope restaurants: WTF?!

Ad-derall: Dunkin Donuts Tuna Sandwiches

Ad-deral is (Amanda's!) new column in which we rant and riff on the ridiculous ads we're subjected to while trapped on the subway.  From the borderline racist local businesses (1-800-MARGARITA Divorce Attorneys) to the condescending national brands that pretend to know what it's like to ride the goddamned F train every day (Snickers, Delta), we'll tackle them all with the same smug outlook that has made us totally (not) famous.

I think we all can agree that a best-case-scenario normal ride on the subway still finds you crammed up against at least two to four people.  And I'm talking C-L-O-S-E. Like so close you're worried you might be pregnant, because you're pretty sure you just had sex with someone as you were trying to get to the motherfucking Jay Street exit.

Click to read more ...

Ain't No Thang But A Chicken Wing

Have you ever been eating a hot, delicious $0.40 chicken wing on "Wing Tuesday" at Buffalo Wild Wings and thought to yourself: "this is so fucking good I could seriously stab or shoot someone right now!"

Oh wait...

(via Gothamist)

'You Say Goodbye, And I Say Hello'

(photo via Brownstoner)

Hello to:

*Laytner's Linen & Home - opening up on Union Street between 6th and 7th ave's. They will allegedly be selling expensive sheets, expensive towels and all sorts of other expensive shit that you don't yet know you want, but SOON WILL. Yay! I'll finally have something to do while I wait for late, irresponsible zipcar assholes who can never seem to bring my fucking "Winny" back to the garage on Union on time. (Brownstoner)

*Hog Mountain - no siree, that was not a typo, folks! Hog Mountain is a new dude store for manly, man dudes that opened up on 5th Ave and Sackett. They sell clothing, outerwear, toiletries, and some hardware. 68 fans on Facebook can't be wrong, so I would go man up and check it out pronto. (Brownstoner)

*Provini - we tried it. It's DELICIOUS. <3. It's from the Bar Toto/Bar Tano crew and is on 8th ave and 13thish. Thoughtful, fresh Italian food with a killer beer/wine list. (Brooklynian)

*El Jalapeno - also tried it...also pretty friggin good. If these mofos can steer clear of the passive/agressive signage, this shit might work. (FIPS)

*Little Buddy Biscuit Company - is on 5th avenue across from Eagle Provisions. And despite some confusion, its *not* a dog bakery and its *not* just a biscuit shop (which is what I originally thought). It's a regular ole bakery that sells cookies and scones and all sorts of other delicious, fattening shit. I haven't been there yet, but its ON my list. (Brooklyn Food Blog)

Goodbye to:

*Juniors - no, they aren't closing, and yes they have one of the best turkey reuben's I've ever had, but they are dead to me now. (Daily News and FIPS)

Provini Hates Kids? I Love Provini

So remember when Provini drew the ire of an angry Park Slope Parent on Yelp? And then it exploded into an angry debate between BALLERS, BREEDERS, and people who just love a good online fight (wanna read a good, albeit out-of-date one? Check this out ). 

If you're not already up to speed, the dramarama was based around the fact that some woman wanted to bring her nine-month-old daughter to the restaurant, and called ahead to see if they provided high chairs.  Provini said they didn't, but to come anyway.  Lady shows up and then gets pissed that there's no room to park her stroller.  When she complains, she is told that "Provini is not a child-friendly restaurant."

Click to read more ...

Who Gives A Shit: Is the Music at Dram Shop *That* Bad?

Cause apparently Daveon8th seems to think so:

"Dear Dram Shop,

It is with a heavy heart that I post this online but you just don't seem to have a clue about the slide that you have taken in the last few months. From the week that you opened to the first time(of many) that I ordered your cheeseburger, or the time that on the eve of our wedding my wife and I took our siblings to hang out for the first time as group. One thing has bothered me consistently. The horrible, out of place music that you play at an absurdly high volume."

The alleged music in question is apparently Feist and Sarah MachLachlan...which, for me is admittedly a little weird (I expected it to be some annoying techno bullshit or something). In truth, I've stilll never tried the burger at Dram Shop because the two times we tried going, the service was so fucking horrendous, we walked out.

So, I guess today I have 3 simple questions: Is the music at Dram Shop really *that* bad? Is the burger at Dram Shop really *that* good? Does the service at Dram Shop *actually* suck a dick, or was I just there on two off days?

You know what to do, people. 

Again, answer in the comments (and feel free to go stealth anon if you want some priv-ass-y).

(via Brooklynian)

Uhm...Don't Go To Juniors Anymore, K?

(exhibit A)

(exhibit B)

(via Brooklynian)

NOTE TO FUTURE TENANTS: PRESIDENT & 5TH AVE *IS* TOTALLY FUCKED

Even CNN says so!

It wasn't your fault, Playa. That spot must be over some Indian burial grounds or some shit.

Anyone wanna meet over there with a Ouija board and see what we can uncover?

(via an awesome FIPSer who emailed that CNN link in)