Science-y Test Maybe Finds Old Locomotive Under Atlantic Ave...Maybe Not.

Photo from Locomotive Engines Upon Railways by DePambour, 1836

The Brooklyn rumor mill is reporting mumblings of a large, local cavernous tunnel filled with an unknown object, and no, I’m not talking about Kim Kardashian’s recently-announced pregnancy.

Special science-y tests have detected a large, 20 foot metal object, rumored to be a 19th century locomotive, far inside a half-mile long tunnel near Hicks Street. “It’s like finding a giant hoard of gold,” said Bob Diamond, founder of the Brooklyn Historic Railway Association. “That locomotive has been sitting there since the outbreak of the Civil War — it’s like a living piece of history."

READ MORE

FIPS HOLIDAY GIFT GUIDE: Brooklyn Snobs

“I can’t even imagine living in Manhattan ever again after moving to Brooklyn."

Yeah, you know the type. The Brooklyn Snob is a common breed with a penchant for all things local, organic, and Kings County-centric. Don’t know what to gift your BK lovers this year? Follow this guide to Brooklyn snobbery and you’ll be set.

READ MORE

Parents Form Group to Make New K-5 School as Hot as P.S. 321

There’s a new school in town, and parents are gearing up for it to be P.S. 321, part deaux. After the Department of Education's recent school rezoning proposal passed, some Park Slope homeowners and renters who purposely bought or found places in P.S. 321’s district were pretty pissed. No longer would their beloved offspring be eligible for the coveted K-5 school. They'll now be sent to a yet-to-be-named school in the St. Thomas Aquinas building on 8th Ave and 4th Street.

But alas, Park Slope parents do not fuck around.

READ MORE

Alternate-Side Parking: We Hate It, But We Hate Not Being Able To Hate It, Too

Image via vosizneias.com

The NY Daily News just unveiled an enlightening piece about Park Slopers who have been creating quite the shitstorm caused by another shitstorm. Residents of our fine neighborhood have been bitching about the recent lack of alternate-side parking because the NYC sanitation department is busy focusing on parts of the borough that were more affected by Hurricane Sandy.

Yes, you read that right.

READ MORE

Dear Mayor Bloomberg: Why Do You Hate Blogs?

Image Via Gothamist

Dear Mr. Mayor,

Recently, you told the Atlantic that you prefer getting your news via broadsheet rather than on those things you call "blogs," and that you aren't even entirely sure what the difference is between a blog and a newspaper. You even added that you think we might be bringing society to a newer, dumber, level of journalism with these so-called "blogs."

Mr. Mayor, I'd like to make a case for a world in which we all can live together in some sort of journalistic Utopian society. First, you are right in some respects. I don't want to get my updates on international news from a place from some snarky bloggers . But when I want to hear about asshole babies, or an account of someone who was mugged at an upscale yogurt shop, I need a place to call my own. You think the NYT is gonna feature a story about tree sweaters? HELL NO.

READ MORE