FIPS Raison D'Etre

photo: petographs

Dear Everyone Who Thinks This Blog Should Go Suck A Dick,

Right.

Well, at least we're not a blog THAT IS COMPLETELY FUCKING WRITTEN BY MARTHA STEWART'S DOGS.

I am not shitting you.  Her French Bulldogs Francesca and Sharkey have a blog...and attend meetings...and write posts.  On THEIR BLLLLAAAHHHHGGGG.

This thing e-x-i-s-t-s.

And if THAT blog gets to exist out in the world, than I don't want to hear FUCK ALL from any of you mofos about this one.

xo,

FIPS

p.s. This is our dog Oliver above.  And he mostly sits around licking  his asshole, eating stray fruit loops that have fallen behind the couch and whining like a little bitch to be taken out on walks.  He doesn't have a blog.

Did You Lose Your Shiba Inu?

(This is NOT a pic of the actual dog, but in case you don't know what the breed looks like, I wanted to post).

I read about this on Brooklynian, and I've been sort of nauseous since with worry

WE FOUND A SHIBA INU ON 3/1: he's a sesame male (we think) about 25 pounds. We found him on President and 6th. He spent an hour under a parked car while we tried to corner. He was very skittish at first but he's calmed down since. He is even trying to mooch food off the table. He is obviously somebody's dog.

If anyone has scoop on who this dog might belong to, please get in touch with the nice peeps who found him.

Poop Slope

(via Overheard in NY)

BREEDER vs. BALLER: Who's More Annoying: Kids or Dogs?

This week's guest BALLER post will be written by: BALLER BITCH. Cause the *real* BALLER has a cat (and BALLER BITCH has a dog), and everyone knows that dogs are way better than cats.

Click to read more ...

HOLY SHIT! Now I Gotta Worry About My Dog Getting 'Dognapped!?'

The current issue of The New Yorker offers up deets on a ridiculously frightening crime wave taking shape on the UWS: dognapping.

Sonofabitch.

Here's why I *think* me-n-Oliver are probs gonna be ok:
1. I NEVEREVERNEVEREVEREVEREVER leave him tied up alone outside.
2. I NEVEREVERNEVEREVEREVEREVER leave him tied up alone outside.
3. I NEVEREVERNEVEREVEREVEREVER leave him tied up alone outside.

Also I'm a black belt in Karate...and I carry a rape whistle...and mace...and a gun...and Oliver is very, very vicious and will bite you and make you bleed...so DON'T steal him, pleez (and be careful with your own pups!).

(City File via The New Yorker).