[WHAT YOU SHOULD ORDER AT...] Sette Enoteca e Cucina

WHAT YOU SHOULD ORDER AT... is a recurring column designed in kind for your opinionated asses and our lazy asses.  We're going to pick one Park Slope resto a week and recommend our favorite dish at each.  Are we right?  Are we wrong?  YOU KNOW YOU WANNA WEIGH IN.  

Here's a conversation you may have had:

You: Honey, you want to go to Sette (pronounced: SET) tonight?

Your Wife: You are a complete moron.  It's pronounced Set-tayyyy!  I know this because I traveled to Italy for one week back in college in 1994 so I KNOW what I'm talking about.

You: I don't even care.

That's my attitude, anyway.  SET, SET-TAYYYYY, whatever.  I go with the non-fancy pronunciation, mainly because I'm not Italian and I don't want to sound like one of those pretentious dbags who try to inject little ethnic pronunciations and colloquialisms into basic conversation just to sound moderately cultured and hip.  They're all like, Hey, buddy, I'll see you MANANA!  And I'm all like, Hey, BLOW ME. 

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PRIME 6 PETITION TWO: ELECTRIC BUGABOO

God bless the fucking Internet, AMIRITE?! I would suck the internet's dick and let it shoot its load inside me.

I mean look: let's say you came across some blatantly racist whore, who needed to be schooled in an incalculable number of ways, but you knew that nothing you could ever do would teach her a lesson. The whole experience would leave you frustrated with the awful knowledge that she would never in a million years get what was coming to her!

But with the internet, you simply post about her on your blog that gets a million pageviews a month, and then BAM! Gawker, Gothamist, the NY Post, the Huffington Post, the Wall Street JOURNAL--all these fun-loving guys join in the fun, and pretty soon the entire tri-state area is calling her a cunt.

I wonder where she is, yaknow? Have you guys been thinking about that too? I want to see her reading all this press - I wonder if it's getting the message into her skull? Nah, it never does - I guarantee you she just just feels misquoted, maligned, and misunderstood.

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BREAKING: Park Slope Eatery Files For Bankruptcy...And Fails DOH Inspection. BIG TIME

Ok, this is no big surprise as this place was all kinds of lame, but that weird deli/diner/hybrid whatever on Seventh Ave and Fourth Street, Park Slope Eatery has filed for bankruptcy. They owe $95,000 smackers to 18 different creditors.

HOWEVER, I think the bigger news here is their revolting Department of Health inspection:

"On Feb. 22, Park Slope Eatery received a restaurant inspection score of 107 and had 19 violations, 12 of them deemed "critical," according to the health department. The restaurant's letter grade is still pending, but in the inspection world, higher scores indicate more woes. Only 16% of restaurants inspected between February 2010 and Jan. 31, 2011, had an inspection score higher than 28, according to health department statistics."

Barf shooters all around?

(via Crain's NY)

MORE BURGERZZZZ!

Are you still excited about Cheeburger Cheeburger?

Well get MORE excited, cause according to Here's Park Slope, we've got more burgers a comin. This time, it's some joint called Bare Burger, and YAAAAY! Everything is organic, all-natural, hormone-free, free-range, grass-fed, home on the range! And they have Elk, Bison, Lamb, Turkey, AND beef burgers, in addition to lots of other shit.

OH, and they also have a billion dipping sauces for their fries and onion rings...I love that!

They currently have 2 other locations: one in the city and one in Astoria, and their third will be in the old Artesana space on 7th Ave and 1st street.

I know it's kind of all burgers all the time around here, but I don't really give a shit cause I love burgers.

(via Here's Park Slope)

Brooklyn Pita Is Meat-tastical

Ok, so maybe this isn't new and I'm just completely oblivious every time I walk by: but I have never noticed Brooklyn Pita's gigantic meat-tastical sign before! It's hanging right above their front door, and it's really pretty magical! In a meaty kinda way.

I mean, look at this fucking thing! It's like a giant shwarma meat trophy! With a juicy red cherry tomato on top!

It's a meat sundae!

I wanted to throw pitas at it and light candles-n-shit.

Have you ppl seen this thing?