A Beer Floodtastic FiPS Food & Drink Roundup

OMG TODAY IS THE 200TH ANNIVERSARY OF THE GREAT LONDON BEER FLOOD! That's right...on this day in 1814, a huge ass vat at a brewery in central London totally exploded, releasing thousands upon thousands of liters of beer upon the sad, surrounding tenements, drowning eight Brits. As such, I've got alcohol on the mind today. Also, it's a weekday.

You should have alcohol on the mind too! This past week, Park Slope saw its options for getting blotto expand, with even more options on the horizon. On a sadder note, we got OFFICIAL confirmation that one of the better locations for drinking in the hood really IS going to get a lil bit lamer.

The biggest news on the drunky front is news that's been a long time coming. Almost eight months after they first opened their doors, Calexico FINALLY has their liquor license. JESUS CHRISTO that took forever. They started serving beverages from their full bar last Friday but they’re "officially announcing" it starting tomorrow. To celebrate, they're doing two-for-one drinks all weekend long, with 10% of the proceeds from your drunkenness going to the Prospect Park Alliance. Also…TACOS.

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A Non-John Lennon-Themed FiPS Food & Drink Roundup

It's officially the fall, folks. Pumpkin spice abounds. As is the case every fall, there's always a crop of new restaurant & bar openings to look forward to. At the same time, far too often the fall means restaurants shuttering after a disappointing summer. As we make our way through October, it looks like there are a lot more openings than closing in the hood, so I guess that's a good thing.

Tomorrow, Brooklyn Porridge Co. reopens for their second season, after debuting last year in the space occupied by Uncle Louie G’s during the warmer months. Last year, as the winter tried to kill me, I stopped by a few times. Meh. It's gonna take more than a bowl of grains to get my motor running, especially at $7 for a tiny bowl of the stuff. Still, I'll probably find myself there at least once this winter, likely around the time when it gets so fucking freezing that it's a wonder that I've actually left the apartment.

In reopening news, last week The Chocolate Room officially opened their doors to their new, larger space down 5th Ave between Bergen & St Mark's. I, for one, am more excited about the impending arrival of Nunu's Chocolates in the hood. Park Slopers seem to enjoy The Chocolate Room though & I’m going to spare you from my brilliant chocolate/poop/Park Slope breeder joke, so I guess there’s no need to shit on them for now.

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Berg'n: The Great Takeover?

Full Disclosure: I've yet to see Guardians of the Galaxy. I couldn't care less. I know. Amazing Marvel adaptation. Bradley Cooper plays a Raccoon. Vin Diesel revisits the role he's become famous for...a talking tree. I get it. The Guardians are a ragtag group guardianing our galaxy or some shit. There's an orb. Somebody wants to take over. There's always somebody who wants to take over.

Google wants to take over the internet. Transplants want to take over Park Slope. ISIS wants to take over pretty much everywhere. In the Brooklyn culinary sphere, the boom of hipsters & depression over the past decade has led to beer halls taking over the Brooklyn landscape. It's no ebola-sized infection, but in terms of square footage that I'm not willing to research & calculate, it's still notable.

I think back to 2008. Lil Wayne's The Carter III was about to sell a million copies in week one. WEEZY TAKING OVER. In this climate, Jonathan Butler & Eric Demby decided to start some thang in Ft Greene called the Brooklyn Flea. They added food. Locals flocked. Hipsters flocked. Six years later, they've become the guys behind a flea empire that expanded to Williamsburg & DUMBO, added "Smorgasbrewery" events at Brooklyn Brewery, expanded to D.C., failed in Philly & took over the Park Slope market at PS 321. Now, a half year after the initial anticipated March opening date, they've joined forces with the beer hall movement to open Berg'n, a Crown Heights beer hall on fuck you guess which street.

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2 Duck 2 Gooseious

In this go-go technological world, people don't have time for full words & phrases. Everything needs to be shortened or, as I like to say, abreived. Take 2 Duck Goose, a Cantonese restaurant that opened back around the beginning of August in the space on the corner of 4th Ave & 6th that was formerly occupied by Anthony's of 4th Ave Pizzeria.

They named the place after the beloved Duck Duck Goose children's game but this is 2014, so it's "2 Duck Goose" to you, missy.

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A Non-Slurpee 7/11 FiPS Food & Drink Roundup

It's SUMMA BITCHES! Shit's been SO DAMN HOTT out there. This past week, shit's also been SO DAMN HOTT in the world of Park Slope food & drink. It's a literal whirlwind out there! Times be tough. Restaurants can't survive no more. There is no future. We're all gonna die one day. Before we all die, let's reflect on all the recent activity in Park Slope...

It's SUMMA BITCHES! That means your fat ass should be inhaling as much ice cream as humanly possible before the shitty winter months arrive. In furtherance of this cause, next Tuesday Ample Hills is finally getting around to opening up their MEGASHOP in Parkwanus. Gorge away, ice cream enthusiast. SALTED CRACK CARAMEL!!! FAT! ASS!

Do you like new signage? Does the idea of fresh, commercial signage just get you SO DAMN HOTT?!!! This past week, signage finally went up at two of the Barclays area's coming attractions--Doughnut Plant & Shake Shack. Stop by the Barclays area. Gaze up at the new signage. Take a mental pic. Go off & masturbate somewhere.

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