We eat local... shop local... why not date local?

Park Slope resident and comedian Scott Rogowsky is tired of dating girls who live in the Manhattan. So he decided to hit the streets to see if he could find himself a match right here in his own neighborhood. Screw online dating - Rogowsky is here for "offline dating." And he's making some pretty great promises, including:

• Dinners at Talde!
• Lunches at Bierkraft!
• Brunches at Du Jour!
• FroYo at Culture!
• Walks in Prospect Park!
• Comedy shows at Union Hall! 
• Concerts at The Bell House!
• Movies at The Pavillion!
• Thrifing at Housing Works!
• Netflix in my apartment!

We'll skip 'Movies at The Pavillion," but not bad, eh?

Rogowsky continues: "We can also do laundry together, go food shopping together, start a paleo diet together, do yoga together, read the Times together, watch Girls together!"

Seriously - this sounds too good to be true. 

See how Slope residents reacted:

The Daily Show Goes Shopping At The Park Slope Food Coop

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"Food shopping...it's kind of a pain in the ass. But did you know that there is a way to make it much, much worse?"

BWHAAAAHHHAAAAAA!

Epic thank yous to Jon Stewart and Samantha Bee for making me laugh my ass off for a solid five minutes and 19 seconds with their hilarious coverage of the Park Slope Food Coop Israel ban ridiculousness. 

The world is a better place now that this video is in it.

No One Wants to Hear "SHIT PARK SLOPE PARENTS SAY"

The NY Daily News recently reported that a Park Slope mommy is collecting material to make her very own "Shit Park Slope Parents Say" video.

Please take a moment and let this fully sink in (but resist the urge to set your computer on fire. After all...it belongs to the company).

As if we need ANOTHER "Shit _____ Says" video. I actually can't fathom something less funny than Park Slope parents reciting their inane babbling in a quickly-clipped internet video that will for sure not have Juliette Lewis in it (if Buscemi is included, however, I will reconsider this entire post).

Click to read more ...

In Search Of The Next Aflac Fuck...Errm...I Mean Duck

I'm sure most of you are aware that Gilbert Gottfried, voice of the ever popular and obnoxious Aflac Duck, got canned a few weeks ago as a result of cracking Japan jokes on Twitter.

As I was scanning the interwebs this morning instead of working, I came across this CNN clip of retarded hopefuls auditioning to become the next Aflac Duck. I really hope to god these aren't the best they could find. Maybe they should come audition some people from Park Slope, or atleast take it to the streets of NYC?

I bet a toothless, drunk and raspy voiced homeless man would make a great replacement...sort of like the next Golden Voice Kraft whatever the fuck his name was dude.

Click to read more ...

T-Mobile Owes Park Slope Some Free Cell Phone Service Or Some Shit

They're sponging off our "brand." Sheesh!

Billboard spotted on the West Side Highway, FYI.

(via @ParkSlopeGossip)