[My Favorite Park Slope]: Place To Be A Cheap Ass

Some people take naps, watch TV, or cook a meal to relax and unwind... I like to peruse discount stores.

Now, I don't mean like, Woodbury Commons or anything. More like...the Dollar General. So, when I need to take myself down a few pegs, after a mildly tough workout at the 9th St. NYSC, I head toward 5th avenue's DII:Deals and Discounts to embark on a cheapskate's fantasy. 

Not everything is a dollar up in this joint, but things are pretty damn cheap and the selection of goods is nice and random, as they should be in such an establishment. I'm on board with buying tacky neon lace curtains, irregular off-brand tampons, and reject men's v-neck Hanes t-shirts ALL AT THE SAME CENTRAL LOCATION. 

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Park Slope Parents Steal Their Own Bike Back

Photo via NewHiker.com

The Brooklyn Paper recently reported that a Park Slope dad took matters into his own hands after his family's bike was taken from it's usual parking spot in Park Slope and relocated to somewhere in Ditmas Park. Parent turned people's militia up in here, people. Apparently the cops were called and they said they couldn't do anything unless he had a serial number and proof of purchase for the bike (who keeps that shit?). But then the 5-0 supposedly hinted that the lock didn't seem like it would be too tough to cut, with the right tool. After a short trip to the hardware store, the family rode away into the sunset, back on their trusty steed. 

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Does Bay Ridge Blame Park Slope For Tire Slashings?

Over three-dozen cars’ tires were slashed in Bay Ridge on 71^st and 72^nd st. this past Monday night, and neighbors are looking at a Park Slope tire shop for some answers. Danny’s Rims, Tires, and Accessories had peppered the same rows of cars with business cards advertising their services a couple days earlier. “It could just be coincidental, but it’s kind of fishy,” one neighbor who declined to be identified told the Brooklyn Paper. “Most times, it’s just some kid and they hit one tire. But this time, they did it so that you can’t just throw a spare on.”

 OK, well yes, that seems fishy and highly coincidental. BUT… it just doesn’t add up. 

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HERE ARE SOME THINGS TO GET YOU THROUGH THE REST OF THANKSGIVING WEEKEND (TURKEYPOCALYPSE)

  

Thanksgiving: it's a holiday weekend that really starts with a bang on Thursday, but leaves us having to figure out what to do with our stuffing-stuffed selves for the next few days. Here are some helpful hints of what to do post the Turkeypocalpyse: 

I hate leftovers. I mean, I can eat Thanksgiving Round 2 about 12 hours after I consumed it the first time, but then what? God knows there’s more turkey and fixin’s than I can shake a stick at, and dagwood sandwiches are looking kinda' meh at this point.

Martha Stewart has of course thought of about 2,000 ways to correct our little problem (along with inventing a lot of problems we didn’t even know we had). Here are 35 OF HER BEST-LOOKING POST-THANKSGIVING LEFTOVER RECIPES. Here are my personal favorites of the bunch: 

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Mother + Daughter Lingerie Spread...Hot Or Absolutely Disgusting?

Image Via the Lake & Stars

The Lake and Stars, a New York-based lingerie company owned by fellow Brooklynite Maavan Zilberman, was apparently inspired by a neighborhood mother and daughter pair -- who Zilberman notes were, "always so loving and tender toward each other" -- for their most recent ad campaign. 

Not much shocks me anymore, people. I mean, on my 3 block walk from the subway to my workplace, I'm greeted (pre-coffee) by 3'x 3' cotton underwear-laden crotches of the American Eagle advertising. Then I stare up at sweaty, yet nonchalant shirtless Guess models in mid-hump on the other side of the street. As New Yorkers, we just get used to it. 

But I'll tell you...this ad kinda' grosses me the fuck out.

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