Dude, Where's My Car?

Ok, so this isn't Park Slope, but it *is* still Brooklyn. And it *is* kinda fun (in a sick and twisted way) to watch the rims get stolen off of a Nissan parked on 73rd street.

[Sidenote: dude has some KILLER vid for his insurance claim!].

[This one's for you, @robnyc @JakeTaylor! NO BABIEZ!]

Robbed in Park Slope? [OH YES WE CAN]

As a restaurant owner in Park Slope, you need to stay on top of a couple of key things:

• employee walk-outs
• pleasing BREEDERS

And now we can all go ahead and add "not getting robbed" to the list.

The Brooklyn Paper is reporting that in the last month: Al di La, AOC Bistro, Aji Bar & Lounge (ok, I've never even heard of that) and Nuevo Mexico have all been robbed (all the action went down late at night after the staff had alreay left, but still).

I have no idea what this means. Like does this shit go down every month and we just don't know about? Are these robberies connected? Have a group of vigilante Food Coop members decided to hit up any restaurants not using locally, sustainable grown food?

I DON'T KNOW.

But you know how I like to keep your asses in the loop (so yeah, you're welcome).

(Fork in the Road via Brooklyn Paper)

BREAKING: Fresh Direct Has Got Bigger Problems Than Idling Trucks [ACCIDENT ON UNION & 8TH AVE]

Yowza.

A Fresh Direct Truck smashed the shit out of a Pathfinder last night on the corner of Union and 8th Ave.

First of all, let it be said that the corner is a total fucking menace. I'm not sure what goes on there, or why its so prone for having accidents happen there, but it sooooo is.

Last night at around 10:30pm, Greg came running up from his basketball game with a directive for me to get down to the street pronto. He swore that a Fresh Direct truck, not moments before had plowed into a Pathfinder (and the 5 cars in front of it) and that if I cared at all about journalism, or my neighborhood, or any of you bitches, I would go. I grabbed my camera (braless, ppl! That's how *much* I CARE!) and ran down to snap some photos.

Click to read more ...

Gowanus Canal Goo: It Doesn't Get Much More Toxic Than This, Ppl

Cleaning the Canal from Characters of Gowanus on Vimeo.

This shit eats through heavy duty plastic...and gawd knows what else.

[Sidenote: guess the Gowanus Canal is the obvious choice, if you ever need to dispose of a body?...jus sayin].

Yo, Prospect Park: Stephen King Is Calling, and He Wants His Creepy, Mysterious Animal Butchery Storyline Back

photo: Brooklyn PaperChicken heads, necks, and bloody piles of entrails....its just another beautiful day at Prospect Park.

Some freaky deaky shit is apparently going down in our lovely park, and no one knows who (or what) is responsible. But lately its been looking a hell of a lot like a Pet Cemetary...or a ritualistic crime scene.

And someone(thing) keeps piling all the guts and gore up in pretty much the exact same spot in the SW corner of the park near the lakebed:

“Everybody wants to feed the ducks, and there are chicken heads floating around. They need to come and rake this stuff out.” “Maybe [the intestines] could be left over from a voodoo or Santeria ritual?” said another park goer.

AYFKMWTS?

Dub tee eff, people?

(via Brooklyn Paper and Gothamist)