FIPS CARES: Strap-Ons

Well, its been awhile folks, but just so you know: FIPS [still] CARES.

We have a rather compelling FIPS CARES request this week from Park Slope rez nyhydro50:

I have a fantasy. There's no easy way to say it, so here goes - I want to get done by a girl with a strap-on. I live in Park Slope, and I am not fat or ugly. If you are interested email me nyhydro50@aol.com. Talk Soon!

I have to say the "Talk soon!" with the cutesy exclamation point is really what got me (though, in contrast, the aol email addy is pretty much a deal beaker. Who the fuck still uses AOL???).

Anyway.

I assume nyhydro50 is a dude, but I'm really not sure. Anyone (with looser email restrictions than I) wanna help this poor soul out??

p.s. this post was, unfortunately, NOT sponsored by Babeland.

FIPS CARES: Lost Ipod

FIPS cares! (really...we do).

Ok everyone, listen up! We have another FIPS CARES community assignment. Why the fuck should you care? Cause maybe we'll be helping your ass next.

"Bloomie" is a Friend of FIPS (FOF) from way back in the day (like November). And now she needs our help:

While running for the bus this morning my ipod dropped out of my pocket and by the time I realized and turned around and headed back it was long gone. If you hear of anyone who found an 80 gb black ipod classic in a hard case with purple headphones could you pretty, please let me know? I dropped it on Prospect Avenue bt 5th and 6th.

I know the economy is horrendous and we're all poor-n-shit, but if you find "Bloomie's" ipod, let us know and I promise we'll write a big fat post about how awesome and cool and hot and rad you are.  Cause FIPS CARES!

Hi Target, Corp! [Waves Hello]

Thanks to our handy little statcounter program, we see you clicking all around our lil ole site.

We hope you are enjoying our four-part takedown of your Atlantic Center Mall Tarjay!  What with the helpful staff there, plentiful resources and surgeon-like level of cleanliness in the store, it really was quite a hoot to put it all together!

Anyway.

In the meantime, do let us know if you have any questions about:

*The deeply disturbing level of suckage at the Atlantic Center Mall Target

*What you might do about this deeply disturbing level of suckage

*How Park Slope originally got its name.

*Or anything else you might be curious about!

Really...we're here to help. FIPS CARES, yo!

Swine Flu: The Real Facts

Ok, ok, I know everyone has their panties all up in bunch over this whole Swine Flu bullshit.

It's scary...it's spreading...and its heading right for your politically forward thinking, self-important children! [kidding...of course.  Totally kidding, people].

Anyway.

So, as everyone knows, FIPS CARES and we really just wanted to take some time out to ensure that we were doing our part to help spread correct information about this porktastical flu.

To find out, definiitively, whether or not you or your loved ones have contracted Swine Flu, please click here immediately: Do I have Swine Flu?

(via Gillian The Great)

FIPS CARES: FASHION FOR ALL

FIPS cares! (really...we do).

Ok everyone, listen up! We have another FIPS CARES community assignment. Why the fuck should you care? Cause maybe we'll be helping your ass next.

One of our fave FIPSers, Felicia Sullivan has put together an amazing event "Fashion For All" and she needs A LOT of fucking help.

Click to read more ...