Who Gives A Shit: Do you like watching TV in bars with strangers?

Photo credit: Freddie Moore for airshipdaily.com

Lately, it seems like every cable show from Mad Men to Game of Thrones gets the viewing party treatment in bars all over the city. According to The Airship, there were at least two Breaking Bad finale events in Park Slope alone:

I arrived at Union Hall for the premiere screening of Breaking Bad’s final season at 8:34 P.M., four minutes after doors had opened. The bouncer asked whether I was there for the screening or for dinner, and as soon as I answered, he told me, “We’re filled up to capacity. People have been lining up since 6:30 to get in for this.”

With roughly 20 minutes to spare before the premiere began, I attempted to speed-walk a mile to Halyards, the nearest bar I could think of that was also screening Breaking Bad. A couple outside warned me about the crowding, and although Halyards was letting people in, the audience was packed in so tight that viewers were squeezed right up against the projector screen. Everyone had staked their spots. There literally wasn’t any room.

This does not sound like fun to me, at all. Just imagining the epic shushing that must go on at these events makes me break out in hives. What about you? Have you ever gone to a bar to watch a TV show? 

Whassup: 72 Hours of Labor Edition

Your second place Cyclones play Labor Day weekend (via uproxx.com)

Labor Day, I'm told, is the unofficial end of summer, which seems like a really shitty unofficial thing to do given that the season actually lasts until Sept. 21. Why not make the unofficial end of summer Halloween? If it's unofficial, we can make it whatever the hell we want. That's how unofficial works. So let's just pretend summer lasts forever, or at least until the first snowfall (which, if y'all remember a couple years ago, can indeed happen on Halloween). In the meantime, you have a Labor Day weekend to enjoy. Welcome to Whassup: 72 Hours of Labor Edition:

* Thursday, Aug. 29-Saturday, Aug. 31: Re-Birthday Party, Sunny's: Clawing its way back from Sandy-related destruction, without the benefit of disaster-relief funding, Sunny's finally re-opens. Crowdfunding brought it back, and it returns with a three-day party: Opening ceremony with speeches and live music Thursday at 7:30pm. The Xylophone People play Friday and the regular Sunny's Bluegrass Jam returns Saturday. 

* Thursday, Aug. 29-Sunday, Sept. 1: On Fonts, Cloud City (Williamsburg): Fresh off an artist's residency in Mexico, talented young actress and playwright Amy Buchanan's new work "On Fonts" premieres in Billyburg. Don't be like your mom. Go to Williamsburg for the youngster's art, and actually like it there (for a while). 8pm, $12.

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Viacom Has The Hots For BKLYN; Nickelodeon’s Day of Play in Prospect Park

Ok, what’s up with Park Slope and surrounding BKLYN being the center of Viacom’s universe? First VMA’s at Barclay, now this shizzle in Prospect Park’s on September 21^s!  It’s basically a day for your kids that gained the Kindergarten fifteen to do some toe touching, running, heavy breathing, you get the idea, like you in the one and only Zumba class you attended at the Armory. 

I’m sure all the whiners that were against the trashing of The Nethermead this past May are going to be none too happy about this tot and parent filled activity fest. There will be lots of organized athletic activities like double dutch, tennis drills and Zumba (hey, your lazy ass can try it a 2^nd time).  The area will be fenced in and there will be at least three EMS stations around the perimeter in case your pirate-booty-eating, Sponge-Bob-watching-couch-potato rug rats can’t handle a little exertion. Maybe the EMS stations are there for the BTR obsessed fainting tweens. Yes, that’s right Big Time Rush in all their hair coiffed glory will be there.  I’m sure you don’t give a shit, but your little Sophia or Maya or Ruby does.

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F***ed on Cape Cod

There's a reason Amy Sohn set part of Motherland, her sequel to Prospect Park West, in Wellfleet. Cape Cod is a popular destination for many Park Slope breeders, probably at least in part because they have these awesome kettle ponds that double as nature's kiddie pools. Well, thanks to this photo sent in by a friend of FIPS, it seems like not everybody up there is totally psyched about the Brooklyn invasion, if this t-shirt is any indication. Maybe someone up there should start a blog?

Park Slope Missed Connections

Love floods the want ads and there are probably none so infamous as the Craigslist personals section.  When I received this assignment I set out to malign the Craigslist crazies, expecting to find smut-packed posts with pictures of big ole dongs.  What I found was much different and, as it turns out, a bit trickier to make fun of.  I found hope.  Sure there were a few nasty folks out there looking to get their rocks off in a deserted playground, but the surprising majority were well-written and seemingly well-intended.  Whaaaat!?

As I read deeper to find missed connections in our area, the posts read not like desperate sheep fuckers, but far more like journal entries; scratched out stories of—hope.  Shit!  Now, either I’m getting soft in my age or there’s something going on here.  Does the living, breathing animal that never sleeps and leaves the hesitant in its wake need more?  Are you lonely New York?

Here’s some reviews on examples I found: 

The path to target is not one of romance.  Let me not blur the lines, but this dude is just saying “hey,” not, “next time you borrow my lighter I’ll let you burn my nipples."

Sweet and simple.  An animal is mentioned, but not as an object of bestiality as one roaming Craigslist might expect.  We’ve all enjoyed a knowing glance, the brink of connection.  Shit—gets me all squirrely just thinking about it.     

This shit is a bit long-winded.  Get in, get out.  The mention of E.E. Cummings is masturbatory—pardon the pun.  All-in-all it’s pretty damn heartfelt, albeit sappy. 

Nice and straight forward!  Knowing the exact drink is a tad roofie-licious, but I can overlook that for the sentiment behind it. 

Am I urging you to find love on Craigslist Missed Connections?  No!  I am, however, hoping that you take your balls out of your purse, seize opportunity and make your connection before it’s too late.  After all—what the fuck do you have to lose?

I leave you with this last gem of gems:

…he may have gone a little too far.