Viacom Has The Hots For BKLYN; Nickelodeon’s Day of Play in Prospect Park

Ok, what’s up with Park Slope and surrounding BKLYN being the center of Viacom’s universe? First VMA’s at Barclay, now this shizzle in Prospect Park’s on September 21^s!  It’s basically a day for your kids that gained the Kindergarten fifteen to do some toe touching, running, heavy breathing, you get the idea, like you in the one and only Zumba class you attended at the Armory. 

I’m sure all the whiners that were against the trashing of The Nethermead this past May are going to be none too happy about this tot and parent filled activity fest. There will be lots of organized athletic activities like double dutch, tennis drills and Zumba (hey, your lazy ass can try it a 2^nd time).  The area will be fenced in and there will be at least three EMS stations around the perimeter in case your pirate-booty-eating, Sponge-Bob-watching-couch-potato rug rats can’t handle a little exertion. Maybe the EMS stations are there for the BTR obsessed fainting tweens. Yes, that’s right Big Time Rush in all their hair coiffed glory will be there.  I’m sure you don’t give a shit, but your little Sophia or Maya or Ruby does.

Now, you can’t just show the hell up at Nethermead and announce “I’m here for the Day o’ Play…hit me up, Nick!”  No, you gotta get your cheap ass a free ticket and SURPRISE – they are “currently unavailable.”  This is not a psych out…this is for realsies! Nickelodeon is even suspending their programming that day from noon until 3:00 PM, so there is now nothing Nickelodeon-related that I can do that day. Does Nickelodeon even care?  Will I instead be forced to teach my kids how to twerk their way to a beautiful body? Looks like I’m just going to have to haul my science-obsessed, morbidly obese kids' asses to Queens that day.

So, how do’ya like dem lard-covered apples, Nick’s Day O’ Play?! Did anyone get a ticket? Will our beautiful meadow be ruined yet again? WTF NDOP?