SUPPORT THESE BUSINESSES!

 

 

GET F'D ON FACEBOOK

SEARCH
Newsletter Sign-up
GET ON OUR EMAIL LIST IF YOU CAN'T GET ENOUGH OF FIPS
REACH OUR AUDIENCE

GOT A TIP? EMAIL US

Wednesday
Jan072009

Who Gives A Shit: Laundry Etiquette 101?


Another simple question: (if you live in an apt building) Do you think its rude to leave your laundry sitting in the washer/dryer? and/or Do you go ballistic when other people touch your shit in the laundry room?

That's it.

Again, answer in the comments (and feel free to go stealth anon if you want some prive).

Wednesday
Jan072009

[Good Ole Boy/Starfucker Wannabe] In Park Slope


This is an ongoing series in which we attempt to bring you lots 'o different perspectives on what its like to *actually* live in Park Slope...from readers just like you (or not--that's the whole point).

This week: meet a drawlin, ballin, LOLing, kentucky fried funny man: Kary.

I done seen a celeb.

I took up permanent residence in The Slope on October the twentieth in the year of our lord two double naught eight. My wife and I moved here after living our entire lives in the deep, fried south. We moved eleven hundred miles north for two distinct reasons:

1) to circumvent an early death by continual weight gain; and
2) ZOMG, the celebs!

You can imagine my disappointment when, after I had been in the god-forsaken north for two solid months, I had not yet seen hide nor hair of even one grade A, B, or C celeb. My depression spiraled out of control such that I was eating like I did back in The South. If I'm still eating poorly and not seeing any ZOMG celebs, then why the hell did I move here? Sure, I enjoy looking down on people as much as the next Sloper (and it is so much easier in NYC than Mississippi). I mean, I work on the 17th floor--all I can see are heads down there.

To top off the greatest disappointment of my life, some friends from back home came to visit for a few days, and they saw Steven Fucking Spielberg. Now that just plain pissed me off.

Well, all that has changed as of last Sunday afternoon. I am so very pleased to announce my first ZOMG celeb sighting and right here in The Slope even!

See, I was headed over to the Pavillion to see Mr. Benjamin Buttons when my wife spied a man and his family exiting their domicile. I, of course, was busy tweeting about the bicycle gang that was installing a memorial to a lost friend at the corner of Prez and 8th so I did not see this man. She excitedly whispers to me "I think that's John Turturro." I was immediately skeptical as I had long since given up on my dreams of celeb schmoozing and had now gorged my way to what will surely be a premature death of lo mein and french fries. After walking ten yards further, we both stopped dead in our tracks, swiveled our heads inwards towards each other all the way around back the way we had come. We were extremely conspicuous in our humble gawking. But lo and behold, mine eyes did see a real life ZOMG celeb. It WAS John Turturro!

Here is where I have decided not to embellish the tale and spin a yarn about how I approached the royal Turturros on a lovely Sunday afternoon, and they were so taken by my southern charm and grace that they invited us to spend the afternoon frolicking in the park with them and their children. We then retired to their brownstone, ordered Hunan Delight takeout, and watched The Big Lebowski, Cradle Will Rock, and O Brother, Where Art Thou eighteen times each.

Alas, no. Eye contact we did not make and quickly was our lively pace up the sidewalk resumed. We hurriedly made our way to the theater, and all the while talked of our first celeb sighting (of course, while we talked we called, texted, and twittered everyone we knew).

See? Dreams really do come true.

Follow Kary on Twitter here (we do).
Read his blaahhg, Karyhead too.

Join our ongoing series and write for us. Who are YOU? We want everyone repped, so whoever you are, we wanna hear from you. Black in Park Slope? Lez in Park Slope? Puerto Rican in Park Slope? Bitter Mom in Park Slope? Email us

Wednesday
Jan072009

REVIEW: Roots Cafe


Doncha just love when other people write kick ass reviews that you can then link to and avoid doing your damn self?

Yeah, me too.

Check out what Eat Me Daily has to say about Roots Cafe (hint: "This is hands-down, the most insanely awesome, mind-blowing coffee that has ever graced our caffeine-stained lips").

Wednesday
Jan072009

FIPS ToDo's


*Watch Real World Brooklyn...it premieres tonight on MTV! (Recap tomorrow). (NewYorkology)

*Buy a Time Out Cuddle Bear for your misbehavin kid. (Jezebel)

*Track the mysterious maple syrup smell (which has returned!) in NYC. (Gothamist).

*Check out a preview of the new Adult Swim Show: Totally for Teens (It's 2night!). Brought to us from the sick minds of the folks behind Street Carnage, Wonder Showzen and The Daily Show (FREEWilliamsburg).

*Don't be unemployed. (Daily Intel)

*Send your kid to Graydon Carter's High School (applications are now being accepted!). (Cityfile)

Tuesday
Jan062009

FIPS UNDERCOVER: Target, Atlantic Center Mall [The Seventh Level of Hell]



This is part one of our four part series in which we attempt to uncover, once and for all, why the hell Target at the Atlantic Center Mall sucks a big dick.

(see part TWO here)

We double dawg dare you to try to conjure up a more poorly run, haphazardly stocked, woefully understaffed shit show of a retail establishment...a-n-y-w-h-e-r-e. Brownstoner wondered if the big box retailer's empty shelves over the holiday season signified the end of the global recession!

HAAAAAHHHH!

The only thing that shit signified was: Saturday.

Even if you can dig back into the deepest, darkest, furthest reaches of your mind to come up with a more fucked up store, it won't fly...cause dudez! This is Target! Tar-jay!

You're supposed to walk into Target, anywhere, and know exactly what you're getting. This place always looks like downtown Baghdad post Bush/Cheney special sauce bombz.

So here's what went down: we hauled our asses into the store on a typical Saturday afternoon and documented what we saw (and no, it was not pretty). I asked as many Target employees as I could find, one simple question: where are the duvet covers?

Hilarity ensued.

Please note: we have not manipulated or "reused" video in any way here (except to blur out faces). We shot endless rows of empty aisles and did not simply recycle shots of one poorly stocked aisle. This place actually sucks this hard.

Stay tuned for Part 2 next week!