Schooled In The Slope: Class Action Lawsuit Time!

Big day in local education news.

Manhattan momzilla Nicole Imprescia got the partay started by filing a lawsuit against her four year old's preschool for ruining her little Einstein's chances of getting into an Ivy League. Per the Daily News, "she's seeking a refund and class action-status on behalf of similarly wronged toddlers."

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WILL PARK SLOPE PARENTS SOLVE THE TODDLER MASTURBATION PROBLEM?

Masturbating toddlers are a growing concern that could be hitting YOUR Park Slope brownstone 2nd bathroom any day now. A Park Slope parent posted this on PSP (duh) for a "friend" who lives in "San Diego" and hence has no one to turn to for advice... At first I thought it was some shit like San Diego, Guatemala, but even THOSE bitches have the Internet.

So, we have a 4 year-old boy

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Practical Parenting Tips For The Slope

Found this little gem over at JunkSlope.

Is this simply an unwanted book tossed aside..or is there a bigger message here?

'Pregnant In Heels'...Yes, This Is Real Life

Or at least, real life if you're a fucking maternity concierge on the UES.

Le gag.

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KID PEES IN PARK (AGAIN) / OTHER KIDS FROLIC IN IT / I DO NOTHING

The other day I was hanging at the park with my bay-bay minding my own bidnezz and trying to get him to stop eating dirty snow, when all of a sudden shit got real.

Out of the corner of my eye I spied a nanny pulling down the pants of her kid, and I was all, "great, another public diaper changing. EW." But then this lady picks up the kid and carries her pants-down to the closest tree where she pees all over the fucking place. My toddler's checking this shit out with this creepy glee-full expression he gets when he watches Elmo's World, so I just get up and GTFO.

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