Whassup: Halloween Edition

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Today is Halloween, and I can't think of any monster, murderer or sexy devil scarier than the global weirding that likely contributed to last Halloween's awful Sandy storm surge. So, here, read this. Boo! Welcome to Whassup: Halloween Edition: 

* Thursday, Oct. 31: Halloween Block Party, BAM: I really don't care to go into all the details, but it's a bunch of kid stuff. So if you're into those (well, not into them -- if you have kids), then why not? It should be some good, clean Breeder fun, with lots of annoying Halloween music and tooth-rotting handouts. At the Peter Jay Sharp Building, 4pm-7pm, FREE.

* Thursday, Oct. 31: Silent Ball, Silent Barn: Continuing the grand tradition of Halloween cover-band shows, Silent Barn will host Celestial Shore + Steve Marion as Led Zeppelin, Whoarfrost as Nirvana, "You" as Interpol, and other acts. The point, I think, is to get so wasted you think Kurt Cobain and John Bonham have arisen. Zombie rock! 7pm, $12 ($10 with costume).

* Friday, Nov. 1: Co-Work Space Opening, BK Lyceum: The Lyceum adds their space to the stable of co-working sites in Brooklyn. Pretty standard amenities: tables, Internet, a cafe, go-juice (Intelligentsia). It seems like it will be a pretty good place to pretend to do work. Open 8am-6pm.

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Whassup: Here Comes the Halloweekend Edition

topical costume (via twistedsifter.files.wordpress.com)

You've got one week, Park Slope. One week to devise that perfect Halloween costume, the one that will make every Bride of Frankenstein and Sexy Cat (or Wolverine and Sexy Cop, depending on your proclivities) fall for you. No pressure -- but your choice of costume will decide what everyone thinks of you for the remainder of the year. Great costume: fun, creative person I want at my holiday parties. Lame costume: I will consider no longer following you on Facebook. So, reach down into the deepest wells of your creative psyche and dredge out something fantastic. Welcome to Whassup: Here Comes the Halloweekend Edition: 

* Thursday, Oct. 24: HallowMEME Costume Party, Bell House: This is just what you need: a specific, SECOND Halloween costume to think of. But this one's all about Web memes, so expect to see Bell House swarming with Pedobears and Insanity Wolves. It'll be just like being on the Internet, except you will (probably) have your pants on. 8:30pm, FREE (with RSVP). 

* Friday, Oct. 25: Not the Park, Prospect Park: In case you were planning a fairly frigid picnic on Friday in the park, NO YOU CAN'T!! Because Obama. The president will be visiting our fair park, because in these post-2008-Election days, he can no longer fill, say, Central Park. Anyway, maybe you can stake out a spot outside the park and catch glimpse of a helicopter or motorcade. Bring your "Hillary 2016" signs. Noon-6pm.

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Whassup: It Works! Edition

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As I write this, the United States government has just achieved a level of barely-able-to-function that, well, it makes me…proud? Anyway, here's to just barely functioning, a state I hope we all aspire to on Saturday night/Sunday morning. Welcome to Whassup: It Works! Edition:

* Thursday, Oct. 17: "Secret" Arcade Fire Shows ON SALE: You may have caught wind of the secret Arcade Fire shows coming to Brooklyn this weekend -- as several blogs were tipped off by posters for "The Reflektors" (the name of the band's new album). The shows aren't so secret anymore, and in fact tickets are on sale NOW --- as of 10am this morning, for the general sale. If they're not already snatched up by rabid hipsters and efficient bots, then have at it. Be warned, however, that you must wear a costume. Because Arcade Fire will NOT have anyone looking un-precious at their precious secret shows. $45, 8pm, shows are at 299 Meserole St. (Bushwick).

* Saturday, Oct. 19: BK Bacon Takedown, Bell House: BAAAAACOOOONNNNN!!!! 1pm-3pm, $15. 

* Saturday, Oct. 19: CMJ Showcase, Matchless: There are a bewildering number of shows hitting town with the CMJ 2013 festival, and I don't have nearly the energy or appropriately tight jeans to sift through it all. But, why don't you at least check out a local, South Slope act, The Brooklyn What, as they crunch and yelp their way through their old-school, bar rock sound. 7:30pm, $8 (free with badge)

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Whassup: No Government Edition

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Be honest: do you miss the government? Do you miss it yet? Well, you might, if you die from bad chicken because the FDA is currently non-operational. But I know the requisite mood about all of this is cynicism toward the whole institution, so let's just focus on how we all hate politicians by having fun their non-funding faces. Drink un-inspected beer! Eat bad chicken! Dance beside the not-being-cleaned Gowanus Superfund! Do it! Welcome to Whassup: No Government Edition:

* ONGOING: Non-Government Rescue, Skylark: Well, actually, one of the more shitty results of the government shutdown is that millions of new mothers and children will stop receiving food assistance through WIC (the Women, Infants and Children nutrition program). Your friendly neighborhood Skylark Bar is accepting donations of food items to help out -- they'll send the goods to the Bronx-based Children's Rescue Fund. It's as good excuse as any to go have a beer. Donations accepted during business hours: Monday-Sunday, 12pm-4am.

* Thursday, Oct. 10: Fogelnest Files, Bell House: Pop culture-obsessed podcast "The Fogelnest Files" records live, with guests Julie Klausner, of the "How Was Your Week" podcast, and the best dry-delivery-meets-guitar-shredding comedy around, from Dave Hill. And absolutely no promises, but the last Dave Hill show in Park Slope, Friday's "Meet Me in the Bathroom" at Union Hall, featured a certain red-headed comedy saint as surprise guest. That will almost certainly not happen this time. But what? Do you want to risk missing out if it does? 9pm, $15. 

* Friday, Oct. 11: Thrilling Adventure Hour, Bell House: Always a great part of the Brooklyn Book Festival, here's another example of an old-time radio drama. Ham-fisted names! Hushed drama! Sound effects! Cliffhangers! You-with-a-beer-in-your-hand! It's all there. Come twirl your villainous mustache in delight. 9:30pm, $30.

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Whassup: Big, Fat Holiday Months Edition

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We've reached October yet again, my Slopey friends, which means all the summer pressure of looking good outdoors is behind us: it is the holiday season, aka, the GET FAT BECAUSE SOCIETY DEMANDS IT season. First up, of course, is Halloween, with its massive plastic jack-o-lanterns full of Snickers and other candy that is not Snickers. Then, comes the full-on nose thumb at poor, starving countries known as Thanksgiving. Finally, December rolls around, and it's so cold and dark, you just straight up quit trying and kill your heart with egg nog. Hooray! Let the celebrations begin. Welcome to Whassup: Big, Fat Holiday Months Edition: 

* Friday, Oct. 4: Bathroom Secrets, Union Hall: A somewhat serious marketing question: does naming your comedy show something really long and weird attract an audience? Or just cause people to skip over it because they're busy? (Are people busy in New York?) Anyway, this show stars Dave Hill, Todd Barry and Brook Van Poppelen, among others, so that's all you really need to know. The show's full name is "Meet Me in the Bathroom and Tell Me All Your Secrets." Which is a funny name. But you're going to go because Todd Barry will be there, not because of the super-long, weird show title. But, what do I know? I did list it after all. Whatever. Go laugh at Todd Barry. 8pm, $10.

* Friday, Oct. 4-Sunday, Oct. 6: New Yorker Festival, Bell House: The New Yorker Festival will be hosting four days of events at the Bell House this year. Does this mean A) Hooray! Manhattan can't ignore us any longer! or B) Oh, shit. Brooklyn is officially Manhattan Part II now. Either way, you might as well take advantage of some of the doings. You can check out author conversations from the likes of Nathan Englander and Edwidge Danticat, a spirit-tasting, or a live edition of the magazine's famed caption contest. As an added bonus, absolutely everyone there will be wearing monocles. No worries: you'll merely be judged silently (though severely) for not having one. Times vary, FREE to $65.

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