Poutine: Corner Burger's Homage to Canucks

What do all of these things have in common?: Celine Dion, Chris Benoit (RIP), Leonard Cohen, Steven Cojocaru, Corey Hart, Caroline Rhea, and Dick Pound, the former president of the World Anti-Doping Agency. 

Yep, all these mofos come from Montreal.

Sounds like a big list of LAME, if you ask me.

But Corner Burger has decided that another Montreal export is the wave of the future—they're serving NINE different types of Poutine, as well as four Americanized ones for babies who get freaked out by the idea of squeaky cheese curds.

Essentially, Poutine is a pile of artery-clogging goodness; french fries covered in gravy and topped with fresh cheese curds.  Many people refer to it as a dish that looks like vomit on a plate, and it's obviously not the most healthy thing in the world to eat—but maybe you could just close your eyes and accept that you've given up your New Year's Resolution to lose weight by now anyway.

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FOLLOW UP: The Pancake Shop Heartbreaker

From a bummed out FIPS reader:

So, since hearing about the slightly shady and super-seductive Pancake Shop delivery service, I've been dreaming of fluffy flapjacks at my door. I tried to give it a spin this weekend, because their 9am-4pm delivery schedule invalidates my weekday dough joneses.

For at least two days in a row, they have been "not taking orders," and it seems they'll "let me know" when they're ready to go again.

This is frustrating.

I feel like I am dating this pancake delivery service, and it's trying to avoid me until it thinks of a way to let me down easy. There is SOMEONE at the other end promising me free pancakes when they're up and running again, but I just don't know anymore. So now I'm going to some diner and hoping their pancakes can hold me like these never will.

Sounds like a major pancake fail, bitches. Anyone else have scoop?

Farrell's: Where Cheap Mofos Binge Drink

The National Institute of Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism defines binge drinking as drinking massive amounts of alcohol in a short amount of time.  In a two hour span, if you drink more than 4-5 drinks, you're a binge drinker. 

But if anyone's been to college, or to Jackie's Fifth Amendment on a Friday night, you know that binge drinking is pretty much the norm. We all live in New York, where you're physically and emotionally assaulted on a daily basis.  Frankly, I'm pretty sure that the only thing that keeps everyone from murdering everyone in their general vicinity is the knowledge that a bottle of vodka is chilling in the freezer, just waiting for consumption.  That, or a heavy dosage of Xanax.   

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My Shoemaker is More Awesome Than Your Labradoodle

photo: via Brooklynometry (they sell this shit there!)

At FIPS, we like to mock shit. 

I mean, whatever, it's Slope, so it's kinda easy, y'know?  But just because we hate you and your stroller in our favorite bar, doesn't mean we don't totes love our unsung neighborhood heroes.

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SAVE ISTANBUL PARK! SAVE ISTANBUL PARK!

These kebabs are not from Istanbul Park...but shit there is even *better* than these mofos. Guaranteed.

If you’re still wandering all the way over to Zaytoon on Smith St. for your falafel fix, two words: Fuck you.

Seriously.

Each time you make your way over to Boerum Hill for some cheap shawarma lovin’, a very important piece of Park Slope dies.

I’m talking about Istanbul Park (previously mentioned and loved on), which inhabits the space on 7th Ave. formerly occupied by No No Kitchen. Istanbul is all sorts of awesome: otherworldly chicken kebab, perfectly good ghanoush and an array of lamb dishes that make me wonder if the animals were raised on beer and daily massages, just like Kobe cows. This food is seriously good--and cheap. And yet, the place is always empty.

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