Party Barges, Bridges and Oysters: Welcome to the Gowanus of the Future

Imagine by Gowanus By Design

Confession: I'm moving to Gowanus. And even though I found a beautiful apartment, ponied up a giant brokers fee and signed a lease - I still toss and turn with ambivalence most nights. The first thing out of my mouth after I tell people I'm moving to the area is "do you think I made a mistake?" With that in mind, I made an eager study of the winners and finalists in the recent design competition sponsored by Carroll Gardens based non-profit, Gowanus by Design. Entries came from nearly 200 urban planners and designers around the world -- and while none are likely to be realized, I found it incredibly heartening that people in such far flunch locales as Brazil and Finland might take an interest in my soon-to-be little slice of Brooklyn! 

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Gowanus Artists Are Losing Their Lofts to a Park Slope School

Artists residing at the 270 Douglass Street lofts in Gowanus were IRATE upon learning that their space is going to be converted into a new charter school serving Park Slopers. The building is filled with clothing designers, photographers, and artists of other mediums who are pissed -- not at the school, but at their shady landlord (imagine that -- a shady landlord). The dude's been scheming behind their backs, replacing and moving things around in their leases so that he can kick them out at the drop of a hat.

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Sick Of Paying Rent? Live in the Grosswanus Canal!

We all know it's expensive as balls to live in NYC, which is why I'm a WEE BIT jealous of the Brooklynites who discovered a loophole to living rent-free under the radar. Granted, if they step out into the "yard" they'll probably emerge looking like some slimy Rocky Dennis with a gazillion nasty diseases. But still -- their disfigured asses wouldn't be paying a fucking penny to live in the highest-priced city in this here US of A.

A gaggle of hipsters and one environmentalist occupy four houseboats that are currently docked in the toxic stinkfest that we know as the Gowanus Canal (Which, in the case of the hipsters who are just sunbathing in orange thongs and pooping GODKNOWSWHERE, is kind of gross). But for environmentalist Adam Katzman, this lifestyle is an experiment.

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Who Gives a Shit: Do You Flush Your Meds Down the Toilet?

Gawd knows there's plenty of shit in the Gowanus Canal already (pun?), and the District Manager of Brooklyn Board 6 is worried...

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Brooklyn to Get It's Own High Line? On the Gowanus Canal?

Gothamist's Lowline/High Line mash-up, using photos by and Jason Kuffer and MattronOk:

a. BWHAHHHHAAAHHHHAAA! But,

b. How fucking cool would that be???

So, after the Gowanus canal gets de-dead bodied, de-diseased, and de-bacterial infection'd during it's "clean up," there's an architectural competition afoot that aims to turn that mofo into Brooklyn's own version of the High Line! Only they're calling it the "lowline!"

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