CALL OFF THE DOGS: COTMM FIPS-TIGATION UPDATE

Okay, everyone.  This shit is INSANE. 

I just ask a simple question (ie: Where the fuck is my mail?!), and I ended up igniting a firestorm of complaints about the mail service around these parts.  Stories of mailmen hanging out in building lobbies, weeks after weeks of no Netflix, homeless men finding mail in the recycling bin when fishing for empty cans and bottles—it's all super carayzee.

On one hand, it's nice to know you're not alone.  On the other, more pessimistic hand, it's kind of scary to know that this is a neighborhood-wide problem and not just an isolated incident.  So, we decided to mail a letter and test the whole thing out.

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Undercover FIPS-tigation: Case of the Missing Mail (COTMM)

Not to beat a dead whore horse, but this whole not getting your mail thing is kind of a big deal.  Especially around this time of year, when you've got important financial documents coming.  Hey, USPS, how the fuck am I going to get the tax return that kinda sorta makes me forget that my job pays me in candy bar wrappers and thumbtacks?

So, we've decided to launch a full-scale investigation of this situation, and are kicking it off with me mailing myself a "test" letter (see above).   I dropped this sucker in the mailbox on Seventh Avenue right outside Smiling Happy Crack Face Pizza at 6:30AM this morning.  According to my calculations (and considering the fact that the envelope is travelling literally a few blocks away from its current location), I should receive the letter by Saturday morning AT THE LATEST [ed. note: SATURDAY??? Are you fucking kidding me?? You should get that back by tomorrow! If you don't have the letter by Friday, 1/22, protests should be staged]. 

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