FiPS Juicy: Best Stories of the week

Have you guys started your holiday shopping yet? Yeah, me either. Why not put it off a little while longer while you check out some of the stories that graced the pages of our blog over the past week or so!

* Rumorsville: Will food coop members be suspended for missing shifts during hurricane sandy?

* "You are insulting my integrity!" and AND OTHER DECLARATIONS MADE AT THE MOST RECENT SCHOOLREZONING MEETING

* [Review'd] David's Tea

* A FiPS round-up of the best local businesses to clean up after our lazy asses

Who Gives A Shit: What's Your Favorite breakfast sandwich in Park Slope?

Breakfast panini from Bar Toto

I sure fucking love eating a good breakfast stacked between two slices of bread. You know: a breakfast sandwich.  When I’m not running late for work, or too lazy to leave the bed, there are a few choice breakfast sandwiches that I love to get in the ‘hood (side note: if you don’t enjoy breakfast sandwiches, you probably need to reevaluate your life.)

If I want to sit down and enjoy a lengthy breakfast or brunch over a bloody mary, my morning sandwich of source is the breakfast panini at Bar Toto. Their perfectly scrambled eggs are topped with capocollo, smothered in cheese, and stuffed between two wonderfully crispy pieces of toasted bread. Yeah. That shit’s good.

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GET PORKED at Landhaus

DO YOU WANNA GET PORKED???!!! Sweet! So do I!...Like ALL the time. PORKED IN THE MOUTH.

Unfortunately, as of lately I've been getting a little bored with all the places in Park Slope that I usually go to GET PORKED. That's why it's so perfect that two weeks ago Thursday Landhaus, Brooklyn's wandering pork purveyors, moved into the space occupied this past summer by People's Pops.

Landhaus has earned that "wandering" tag over the past few years by foregoing a physical space in favor of a booth at Smorgasburg & The Brooklyn Flea, and a menu served out of The Woods, a Williamsburg bar. Park Slope makes TOTAL sense for their first physical locale, as their slogan is "Farm to Sandwich." You Park Slopers love that locavore shit.

The tiny storefront space, however, is better suited for take-out due to the dearth of seating. Sure, you can sit at one of the few seats along the wall, or you can do like I did & eat off of the Ms. Pac Man machine, but if you show up on an eve where more than a half-dozen people are looking to GET PORKED in-house, you're pretty much taking that shit to go.

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Whassup: Post-Turkey Get Down Edition

via rantsfrommommyland.com

General poll: how many of you are currently still at least 50% turkey? Well done! Of course, I know that you young Brooklynites from everywhere-in-America probably couldn't make it home for Mom's home-cooked, store-bought pumpkin pie so, instead, you had "Friendsgiving," because you're good at wordplay and only wanted to eat organic whatevers. Whatever. So long as you ate too much of those whatevers, I approve. But now, it's time to work off some of that holiday fat by having so much fun it's almost like exercise. Welcome to Whassup: Post-Turkey Get Down Edition:

* Thursday, Nov. 29: Bare! Anniversary, Bell House: The sex storytelling show's one-year anniversary, delayed by some bitch named Sandy who blew everyone (sex reference!), finally gets its day in the red lights! Come see comedians, storytellers, and other purveyors of entertaining communication talk all about the things our stanky parts make us do. 8pm, $10.

* Friday, Nov. 30: Flanks Album Release Show, Jalopy: A local, down-and-gritty country band, The Flanks, will just about have you pulling Alabama dirt from your fingernails. No. But you'll probably stomp the ground a bit. Plus, these guys just love performing, which is fun to see. Say "y'all" at them and feel good doing it. Two sets by the Flanks,  with fellow folk jammers Flight Feathers and the Strung Out String Band taking the other slots.  8pm, $15.

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[Rumorsville]: Will Food Coop Members Be Suspended For Missing Shifts During Hurricane Sandy?

Photo via www.newyork.seriouseats.com

There's a reason why we've referred to the Park Slope Food Coop as militant sanctimonious fascist hippies. If this rumor we're hearing is true -- that members who missed shifts during Hurricane Sandy will be punished -- then they very well deserve that title. The rumor comes via Sandy Report, a site dedicated to areas affected by Sandy and all of her nastiness. Here's what they had to say:

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