FIPS Juicy: Best Stories of the Week

In case you spent all week outside enjoying this San Francisco-like weather, here is a round-up of juicy FIPS news that graced the pages of our blog this week:

* Cool or Not Cool: Bringing a Couch on the Subway
* Pavilion Theater Opens Café -- Smart Move or Destined for Disaster?
* Park Slope Not On Shit List For Once
* End of an Era: Jackie's 5th To Close Next Month
* When Trees Attack: Prospect Park Edition

[FIPS Was There...] A Fitting Farewell to Jackie's 5th

A month ago we were supposed to cover something called the Buzzard's Banquet at Jackie's 5^th Amendment. It was going to be funny because it's a poetry reading at a bar that pretty famously tried to secede from Park Slope because the neighborhood was too sissy now.  I think it was tongue in cheek. That's how I read it.

So we missed it. I missed it. I got the dates wrong and didn't make the Buzzard's Banquet. Then Jackie's announced they were closing and it got a good amount of press. Whatever. Thursday night was the last Buzzard's Banquet at Jackie's and I made it.

They opened with a Bukowski poem which was amazing. Suicide Kid. After that, it was what you'd expect. Personal poetry. Brooklyn guy playing acoustic guitar. It was good if that's what you're into. I spent the night at the bar drinking nips. $10 for a bucket of 6. It's a pretty good deal. (Or was a pretty good deal depending on when you are reading this. Jackie's closes on September 14^th.) But, up to that point, the night was not much to write about.

Then something really weird happened, and my first thought was, "Well, this will make for an interesting post." But when I mentioned that to the people working there, and said that I was there for FIPS, they went kind of crazy. They don't love the site. They demanded I don't write about it. Told me I'm a bad person if I do.  One of them was kind enough to drop a half dozen f-bombs on me. Maybe they were right. Or drunk. I don't know. I think they were possibly wrong and definitely rude. One thing that stuck in my mind -- probably will for a long time -- was the bartender saying "Come on…you can't write about this. I mean it's called Jackie's FIFTH AMENDMENT. Fifth Amendment. Do you even know what that means?!"

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Who Gives A Shit: #1 Brooklyn Anthem

Image via virginmobilefeed.com

As part of the promotional lead-up to the VMAs at Barclays, MTV is all about Brooklyn right now. The latest stunt is a poll to determine which song is the "Best Brooklyn Anthem of All Time." Right now, Foxy Brown's BK Anthem is in the lead at 40%, which, I have to believe is because most of the morons voting are like, "Well, that's the only song with the word 'anthem' in the title, so it has to win." Because OF COURSE The Beastie Boys' No Sleep Till Brooklyn should be the winner, amirite? Why else would MTV be exclusively using that song in all of their promos? I'm guessing some of you will disagree with me. Don't be your usual shy selves, tell me why in the comments.

Your Car Is About To Get Blacklisted

If you have a car on Prospect Park West between 11th & 14th street OR 13th Street between 8th Ave & Prospect Park West you had better move that rod toot sweet before Woodridge Productions tows it at 6 PM today! They will be filming the new NBC pilot Blacklist on those streets tomorrow so hop in your car and go to Ikea or Fairway and repark it NOW.

I spoke to Stephanie, in the locations dept. and, although she was quite nice, she basically said if your shit on wheels ain't gone it will be dumped wherever there is a spot. Windsor Terrace? Gowanus?  Good luck, suckas!  

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Whassup: I Heart Darkness Edition

I like my coffee like I like my soul... (via deviantart.net)

Yesterday was the 10-year anniversary of the blackout, which temporarily sunk NY into something resembling a natural nighttime. I wasn't here at the time, but, like, could you see the stars and stuff? Weird. That must have been terrifying. Well, the lights are on now, in all of our scarily expensive apartments, and the only pure darkness to be found is that of our cynical, NY souls. And that of the black-out drunks with which we dull the stress. Indulge in both varieties of darkness with this week's Whassup: I Heart Darkness Edition: 

* Thursday, Aug. 15: "Rocky," BK Bridge Park: Without this film, Sylvester Stallone might still be making porn flicks. So, thank god "Rocky" was an instant-classic. You know the story: punching, montage, "Adrian!", MONTAGE, steps, punching, FUCKING MONTAGE!!! With the gorgeous vista of Lower Manhattan from the park, it's a great way to see a movie. 6pm, FREE. 

* Friday, Aug. 16: TIX ONSALE: Deervana, Brooklyn Bowl (Williamsburg): Deer Tick, in their sometimes guise as "Deervana," will play Nirvana's classic "In Utero" in its entirety, celebrating the album's 20th anniversary. If this seems random to you, a couple things: 1) Deer Tick does a great Nirvana because singer John McCauley has an eerily Cobain-esque scratchy, strained voice and 2) Deer Tick is a pretty great brand in its own right. Perhaps, like me, you will attend a Deervana showing, and get into Deer Tick's own stuff thereafter. I highly recommend doing this. The show is Friday, Sept. 13, precisely two decades after the release of "In Utero," the grittier, punkier follow-up to the album that birthed the '90's in all its grungy, slacker glory ("Nevermind," duh). Tix on sale 12pm, $25.

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