An Open Letter To *Some* Park Slope Parents

I dug the recap that the City Room blog did summarizing some of the more "colorful" comments from the Letter to the Editor the other day about the babies in bars sitch in Park Slope. But thanks to the magic of google alerts, I came across this fine missive, An Open Letter To *Some* Park Slope Parents, from fellow BK blog Shouts from the Stoop.

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The Starbuck Stops Here: Since When Are Breeders Not Allowed In Starbucks??

I’m starting to develop a complex.
 
I get that you free and happy people don’t want me and my annoying kids in your bars. And I’m okay with that (although helicopter mom did have a point that we breeders need alcohol by 5:30 way worse than you ballers. And since we’re back home in our jammies by eight, clearing the way for you to move in from 8-2, its not such a big deal. Anyway...)
 
So yeah--I’m willing to give you the bars.
 
But Starbucks? I protest.

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Farrell's: Where Cheap Mofos Binge Drink

The National Institute of Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism defines binge drinking as drinking massive amounts of alcohol in a short amount of time.  In a two hour span, if you drink more than 4-5 drinks, you're a binge drinker. 

But if anyone's been to college, or to Jackie's Fifth Amendment on a Friday night, you know that binge drinking is pretty much the norm. We all live in New York, where you're physically and emotionally assaulted on a daily basis.  Frankly, I'm pretty sure that the only thing that keeps everyone from murdering everyone in their general vicinity is the knowledge that a bottle of vodka is chilling in the freezer, just waiting for consumption.  That, or a heavy dosage of Xanax.   

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BEBES IN BARS: PART XVXLLIV

Hiroko Masuike for The New York Times

Fuck if I even know if that's an actual Roman numeral above, ppl. See I got way bigger fish to fry, so I can't even googlez it. Here's why:

The NYT posted this gloriously penned, ranty, BREEDER bashing letter today, written by a Park Slope BALLER named Risa Chubinsky. Ms. Chubinsky is kind of annoyed that everytime she goes out to get her drink on, her mellow gets harshed on by little Eloises, Mathias' (how the fuck do you even pluralize that??) and Olivia bebes, who seem to be breast feeding, pissing, and lining up their bottles in all the bars this chick likes to go to.

Anyway.

Then Gothamist posted about this shit too, and so what the fuck am I supposed to do people??

So, eventhough I'm gettin ready for all the "snooze!" "boring," "posting about this is like posting a trend piece on hipsters in Williamsburg" bullshit comments from all of your asses, here's what I gotta say to that: TOUGH. I've got to post it too (obvs).

People are still talking about bebes in bars, and so we are too.

Ask A NY Talent Buyer

If you haven't already guessed (based on the fact that we have virtually EVERY FIPS event there), we love the shit out of the Bell House.

I don't play bocce ball (cause I'm not really sporty like that), BUT I do love the hot dog at Union Hall. And also I have great affection for them since they tried to ban SUV strollers last year (though, of course, that didn't work).

Anyway, so yeah: we love em both (and think you should follow them on twitter, go there often, get drunk-n-buy shit).

This week, the NYT City Room blog is featuring Bell House/Union Hall talent buyer, Jack "Skippy" McFadden, who is standing by ready to answer all of your burning questions about the NYC music scene, clubbing, boozing, or anything else talent buyer-ish.

We thought we'd get the party started with a couple questions for Skippy of our own:

• When you're booking shitty bands (that people dig for some unknown reason), do you pretend like you think they're not shitty?
• Do bands (shitty or otherwise) still bitch about coming to Brooklyn?
• Why does everyone in Brooklyn love Animal Collective and TV on the Radio so fucking much? I mean, yeah they're great, but its getting a little over the top. Do you think its some sort of local genetic cellular mutation?
• Can you make sure that all FIPS readers get free drinks from here on in?

Jus wonderin.

[Leave real questions for Skippy in the comments here].