[REMINDER]: Name Some Boars! Go to a Pork Slope Party!

Screengrab via Charging Interests

G'day, ladies & germs! Are you PUMPED! I'm pumped. Patrick Swayze's birthday is less than ten days away, which can only mean one thing…PORK SLOPE IS ALMOST A REALITY. In less time than it takes to finish a seven-game NBA series, you'll be able to experience the throat-ripping, piggy awesomeness that has been promised within Pork Slope's doors.

You don’t want to wait that long though, do you? You're an impatient motherfucker, aren’t you? I hear you. If it takes me more than three minutes to fully masturbate or get a fish taco at the Brooklyn Flea, I friggin' lose it. Calm down, citizen. FiPS has your back.

On Monday, we announced a contest with the Pork Slope/Talde/Thistle Hill/Park Slope Empire dudes, who are looking for some lucky FiPS readers to name two giant boar heads that will hang up by the Pork Slope bar.

If the aforementioned TOTALLY RESPECTABLE Pork Slope dudes (see above photo) like your name, you & a friend will be in attendance at their pre-opening party on the 15th, a full THREE DAYS before the rest of the plebian public. 

So far, a shitload of you have chimed in with mostly-clever names, but I also know that there are a bunch of you who have been biding your time, watching Roadhouse & trying to come up with the best boar handle ever. Stop thinking, dude. You only have until MIDNIGHT TOMORROW to get your names in. Don't get stoned & forget. Head HERE to post your suggestions. Seriously. Don't post on this page & make us have to look at two posts. Go HERE. If you post it on this page no one will read it.

HERE ARE TWO CAVEATS FOR SUBMITTING:

• You can only submit one name per boar (two total). If you drop a comment with any more than two names you won't be considered.
• The winner will be contacted via the email address connected with the Commenter ID (so no need to provide your contact info in the comment).

For inspiration, here are two more of my own suggestions for names:

MONSIEUR SEX POTTERY PIG & SPARKLE MOTION

Bon chance!