WHASSUP: SEE WHAT STICKS EDITION

Sometimes I just have to throw a bunch of shit at you and see what sticks. It's my spaghetti theory of entertainment. If I only go by my tastes, there's sure to be haters and nay sayers. If I try to please you, you may think I'm placating and find me insincere. Instead, I'm here to say here's 7 days worth of shit to fill you time and I don't give a shit what you do. Isn't that refreshing? The truth!

Okay, okay, I give a partial shit. I hope you have some fun on one of these days out. If you don't, please don't come crying to me. I stated my disclaimer in no uncertain terms. I tossed this at you. Let me know what stuck!

WHASSUP, you inevitably wonder as you mop up cold spagheti. Here's WHASSUP:

Thursday, 8/7, Park Slope Bingo Club, Union Hall: B-fore, B-nign, and other inadvertent BINGO phrases I haven’t learned yet. Grab your dabbers and let loose for the most fun you can have for 5 bucks. $5 to play, 7:30pm doors, 8pm show

Friday, 8/8, Cruel Summer 80’s Dance Party, The Bellhouse: The 80’s were certainly cruel to me.  I’m talkin’ flat-top, jams, over-sized kicks, and a black/red leather Michael Jackson jacket. Yep—I was a jew-ish kid of the 80’s. Perhaps the dancing will help me forget woes. $10, 8pm doors, 9pm show

Saturday, 8/9, St Vincent/San Fermin, Prospect Park Bandshell: I’ll admit I haven’t heard of these folks. The earliest I ever showed up for the free concerts scored me seats me seats right behind the shaved ice guy, well outside the range of the speakers or view of the stage. FREE, 9pm show—come early for a spot

Sunday, 8/10, Red Bulls Viewing Party, Brooklyn Bridge: If you still like futbal—excuse me, soccer—then you’ll be happy to pull up your Umbros (anyone, reference?) and lace up your boots for a chance to see the Red Bulls (who!?) kick it on the big, blow-up screen. FREE, 5pm

Monday, 8/11, Best New Standup Comics, Freddy’s Bar: Free comedy has disaster written all over it, but why not give the newbies a chance as they hit you with their best material? FREE, 9pm

Tuesday, 8/12, DanSe de Sade, The Slut Junkies, The Baghdaddios, The Rock Shop: If you follow my column you know that from time to time I choose an event bases solely on the name of a band. This is one of those times. I mean…The Baghdaddios!? That is fucking awesome! $8-$10, 8pm

Wednesday, 8/13, The Story Collider: Awkward Science, Littlefield: As an avid reader and occasional understand-er of Popular Science, I’m in full support of an evening of science stories.  Oooh, tell the one about the time the zygote and the dark matter went to a bar. $10, 7:30pm doors, 8pm show