Whassup: Restaurant Week Slimming Version

Park Slopians--or as you (probably) like to be called Plopians--currently gorging on the bounty of Dine In Brooklyn Week: loosen those belts and prepare for some belly-bustin' activity. It's this week's Whassup:

* Thursday, March 24-Sunday, March 27: Second Annual Spring Cyclying Expo & Sale, from Ride Brookyn. Make a promise to yourself--or at least a convincing lie--to peddle your way to both a slimmer body and smaller carbon footprint by visiting this four-day cyclepalooza. You can get deals on bikes and related accoutrements while soaking up all sorts of bikey knowledge from clinics and guest speakers who will most likely be wearing irresistible biker shorts. It all takes place at Ride Brooklyn.

* Saturday, March 26: Hands Around the Lake, Prospect Park: In the heaven which we might as well share with the animals, the geese will thank us for pleading their cause. Join other honking nature lovers to oppose a repeat of last year's grisly goose gassing. BK citizens, local pols, and wildlife advocates will, literally, join hands around the lake. Meet at the Prospect Park Lakeside--enter at Vanderbilt St. and Prospect Park SW and head to the grassy area near the Well House. Gather at 12:30 pm for the 1 pm start.

* Saturday, March 26: Natalie Zukerman and Garrison Starr, Union Hall. As you've already been encouraged to do here, get some vagina rock with these X-chromosome-rich singer-songwriters. 8 pm doors, $10 ADV/$12 DOS.

* Sunday, March 27: Kings County General Store, Southpaw. Return to the days of the Oregon Trail, sans all the dysentery, and stock up on vitals and necessities at the general store. Aside from deer pelts (MAYBE??), you can get local art, designs, food and more. 1-6pm, FREE.

* Sunday, March 27: The NeverEnding Story, Cafe Steinhof: The Austrian eatery's weekly movie series strikes nostalgic gold this time around. The Never--oh, come on. NeverEnding Story! Do I really have to sell this? Just go fucking reminisce already. No cover.

* Monday, March 28: Pizza Eating Contest, Bell House: Nothing burns off Restaurant Week pounds like the frantic mastication of an eating contest. Right? That's how metabolism works, right? Whatever. It's months until Nathan's wiener-centric contest on the 4th, so carb up at this competition to devour NY's other favorite food: bagels! Sorry, no--pizza! You can grab a slice whether competing or just gawking. 8-11 pm.

* Tuesday, March 29: Board Game Olympics, Union Hall: The real Olympics are a pageantry of athletic grace, national pride and sureptitious doping. The Board Game Olympics are a panoply of joyous nerdiness, personal glory...and sureptitious doping. Join in or observe! 7-11pm, $20 per team.

* Thursday, March 31: Rachell Garniez, Barbes: A song that tells a story gives you two artforms for the price of one, like a painting that also raps. Ms. Garniez shares "darkly optimistic"story songs at Barbes' early show. 8pm, donations.