Your FiPS Guide to Spotting Patrick Stewart in the Slope

Photo via www.spitalfieldslife.com

According to the New York Post, which is a newspaper-like publication owned by a wealthy Australian wire-tapper, Patrick Stewart has already been spotted in our neighborhood at such fine establishments as Zito's and Brooklyn Fish Camp.  If you're jazzed by the fact that a new celebrity has moved into our neighborhood, or you're an obsessive fan of a Star Trek franchise that's been off the air for many, many years, you're most likely wondering what you can do to score your own Patrick Stewart sighting.  You're also pathetic.  But so are we.  So here's where you should go:

Click to read more ...

Shared Hatred for Time Warner Will Make Patrick Stewart Your BFF

"We hate all the same things!" (via subspacecomms.com)

Ever since the baddest, baldest, bardiest Star Trek captain ever joined the USS Park Slope Enterprise this summer, I know we've all longed for only one thing: to become his best friend. 

Well, fair Park Slopers, I've got a foolproof plan. Hear me out.

First, the background, as reported on Betabeat: Professor X himself sent out a psychic emanation (read: tweet), elegantly bitch-slapping one of our most be-hated institutions -- Time Warner -- for totally dicking him around re: his cable. 

Twatted the Shakespearean: "All I wanted to do was set up a new account with @TWCable_NYC but 36hrs later I've lost the will to live."

Then, he killed himself. (Jk! Suicide jokes!)

Time Warner, realizing that you can't treat famous, rich gentrifiers the way you treat average gentrifiers went on to apologize (both within and without the fluttery blue wings of the twitterverse). 

Click to read more ...