Dude, Where's My Car? An Awful Journey in Getting My Towed Ride Back

If you find yourself looking for a parking spot on the corner of 5^th Ave and 1^st Street, driver beware.
On the side of the old Great Lakes building (and soon to be new wine bar, Terroir), is an incredibly deceptive parking spot.  ure, it’s kind of near a fire hydrant, but there’s a parking sign right above it, which leads one to think it’s fair game. Plus there’s a yellow line near the hydrant, indicating as long as you’re behind the line you’re in the clear. But if you adhered to the yellow line rule you’d block this driveway that's there, and that would be no good for anybody. Lastly, know that you will nearly always find a car parked in this spot. I know this because my window looks out on it. You won’t be the full 15 feet from the hydrant, but who’s getting out the tape measure?

Certainly not me as I drove in circles in a downpour, with mom, sis and my very cranky co-pilots: Dexter & Morgan (my cats, not the likable serial killer). We were driving from Albany after the holiday break and had a car full of crap to unload, so naturally I was thrilled to find this spot empty for once. I marveled at my good fortune.

Click to read more ...

Parked in Fuck Slope

If you’re brave stupid enough to keep wheels in the Slope, then you probably look forward to legal and religious holidays for more meaningful reasons than not working and spending time with loved ones: you don’t have to move your car.

I’ve set up a series of email reminders and phone alarms that alert me 15 minutes prior to the dreadful 1.5 hour window twice a week when the street sweeper cometh.  Here’s how the hell it plays out for any number of us during street cleaning time, between 11:30AM and 1:00PM:

Click to read more ...

Street Parking App Coming To New York!

One of the censors / photo via CBS NY

There are three things worse than waking up to a dead cockroach floating in your beer.

1. Running out of queso sauce.

2. Downton Abbey withdrawal.

 3. Trying to park in Park Slope (more like NOT Park Slope, am I right?).

Luckily, street parking is about to get a lot easier (read: No more soft sobbing into your hands as you try to find a spot near Union Market).

Click to read more ...

Finally: A Card For Park Slope Drivers To Carry

We could have used this HERE, HERE and all up in here. 

[Via Pinterest]

Park Slope's Dexter Tree Drips Bloody Sap

I hope to never come out of a bodega and find my non-existant car smeared in what appears to be a crime scene's aftermath. A tree located on 1st street between 5th and 6th avenue leaks sap that looks a helluvalot like blood. HOLYSHIT. Park Slope Patch investigated the sitch and reports:

Click to read more ...