A FIPS GUIDE TO MAKING YOUR SHITTY APARTMENT LOOK NICE

Making your shitty Park Slope apt look less shitty is actually way easier than you might think...and I'm gonna teach you how. 

If you own your place, you can get REAL creative and do all sorts of crap, but today we're going to focus on all the renters in the house. Now renters are somewhat limited as they can't just do whatever the hell they please in their apt cause of security deposits-n-shit, but lots of people use this as the perfect excuse to do absolutely nothing. 

LAME.

Every time you open your front door you should feel super excited to be walking into your own special space-- like little unicorns are dancing in your eyeballs and kitty cats are purring in your ears. if not, read on. 

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Screw IKEA. Deck out your Park Slope abode MTA-style

Photo via WookieSlayer (Flickr)

Have you ever sat on one of those wooden benches in the subway and thought, “Damn, this would look sweet in my living room?"

You know you have.  And now, thanks to the MTA, you can adorn you place with all sorts of gently-worn merchandise, such as a genuine 10-ft long bench ($650).  Just imagine the 30-year history of one of those beasts.  How many people have slept on it?  Died on it?  Puked, pissed, fornicated, crapped and dove to their death from it?

Via the MTA's Memorabilia and Collectables page: 

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Park Slope synagogue gets a designer Sukkah

Rendering by Babak Bryan and Henry Grosman

Who said the starctecture trend was over?

As of yesterday, Park Slope's Beth Elohim has a fancy new designer sukkah.

When Sukkot rolls around, most synagogues put up a sukkah, a make-shift praying shelter covered in twigs  much like the ones used by Israelites during their 40-year exile. Not the Beth Elohim synagogue.

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Cool or Not Cool: Asking Friends to Child proof Their Apts?

As we've documented, there's nothing I enjoy more than fighting in the comments with self-important BREEDERS who claim that it's RIDICULOUS and OFFENSIVE for me to assume that there is ANY self-importance amongst their group AT ALL (even as they are brilliantly illustrating this self-importance in the very comments that they are leaving).

But even a smartass BALLER like myself was pretty shocked to come across the following information on our fave blog STFU Parents: there are actually BREEDERS out there who expect people to go through all the necessary steps of "child proofing" their home, before they will come over and grace it with the presence of their bebes.

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Let There Be Light

So true this thing is $210, *but* its a lampshade featuring a hand drawn image of 5th Ave in Park Slope (you can see Miriam's from this angle).

These are reproduced from Gallery work by artist Warren Belshir:

"Warren has been documenting NYC and Brooklyn's ever changing face for 10 years. His work focuses on urban decay and renewal, and the overdevelopment of Brooklyn and New York. He hopes to capture places of New York's forgotten everyday scenes."

There's also a Coney Island one and a 4th Avenue one. too

I don't know...they're def kinda cool, but I think this shit would look waaaaay cooler in the spare bedroom of our Hollywood Hills pad in 15 years when we're like "ZOMG...remember when we lived in Brooklyn, yo!?"