Blognigger Doesn't Like The Court Street Movie Theater Either

Ok, so this little gem was dropped into the comments of my original I Will Never Go Back to Court Street Movie Theater post, but I thought it was worth highlighting becuase, duh, it's BN.

Here's what the OG Brooklyn blogger had to say:

Attention White People:

(I can safely address you this way, since stuck-up White MFA
candidates from the University of Iowa and analogue institutions are the only folks remaining who would call Erica's Court Street Theater post "RACIST")

Attention White People:

I'm delighted to inform you that if you've declared Erica a RACIST based on the description of her Court Street Theater experience, you've just fallen into one of the oldest traps in the book.

Yep, I gotcha like Tawana Brawley's mother on a polygraph: the only person guilty of "racism" in this situation is YOU.

See, you have associated the people who brought a baby to a late night movie, screamed, and threatened violence... with Black people.

Erica must be afraid of black people, because she's afraid of these psychopaths -- and according to you, these psychopaths = black people.

Think Erica is afraid of me or my kids or the president of the Unites States? Ok so, she's NOT afraid of black people now?

Look: We all know that the only ones who would act this way at a late night Court Street movie theater are black. But to say that all black people would behave this way at a movie theater is racist- and that's the logical result of your assertion that Erica's fear of these people equates to a fear or dislike of black people.

For what it's worth, I wouldn't be caught DEAD at Court Street cinema at night because I got a family and I don't want to risk getting shot in a cross fire by niggers.

This is Brooklyn, and that's their turf.

I wouldn't be caught dead at the Puerto Rican day parade, because violence happens there, and I don't want to risk getting stomped by Puerto Rican niggers.

That's their turf.

I wouldn't be caught dead at some rodeo NASCAR redneck bullfight-ass cowboy shit because those white people get violent when they see blacks and Jews, and I'm both. I got a family and I don't want to risk getting lynched by white niggers.

That's their turf.

Attention White People: Niggers come in all colors; America enjoys a rainbow of niggerhood.

Don't front like you're not scared of niggers - it makes you sound stupid.

But yo - when you say all black people are niggers?

Damn, Ms Brawley; you're just being racist.

[for more information, please see: Williamsburg bar NO BLACKS ALLOWED]

Amy Sohn Controversh, Part Deux: 'Don't Hate the Player, Smartmom, Hate The Game'

Just to recap: Park Slope rez and former sex columnist Amy Sohn wrote a book called Prospect Park West that satirizes the stroller mafia, SAHM lifestyle that's so prevalent in our neighborhood. The whole book takes place in Park Slope, and all of the typical Park Slope stereotypes (helicopter moms, sexless marriages, crazies at the Coop, etc) are served up on a silver platter like a warm plate of homemade chocolate chip cookies. And yes people, it really is that delicious. I loved the shit out of this book, but others (like Smartmom, Louise Crawford) seem to hate the living crap out of it.

In fact, Smartmom hates the book so much, she recently wrote a scathing review published in the Brooklyn Paper: "Another Slope Swipe From Amy Sohn." Mind you, this was after she published a lengthy takedown of the novel on her own blog, written in a bizarre Q&A style that made it seem like she was being interviewed for the post...only she was interviewing herself. I guess she forgot that one usually tends to get interviewed after WRITING a book...not simply reading one.

Anyway.

Click to read more ...

Park Slope...The Celebutante of BK

Allow me to share a theory I've been fine tuning as of late: Park Slope is the Paris Hilton of Brooklyn.

[.............]

You might want let that shit marinate in your brain for a minute or two, cause this is some grade A, powerful theoreticals you're about to be peepin.

Park Slope = Paris Hilton.

I've been thinking about this for awhile, and as per u, I'm pretty sure that I'm right the fuck on with this one.

Here's why:

*Everyone claims to hate Paris Hilton, yet she's *always* being talked about - Same fucking thing with PS. Everyone hates Park Slope. Srsly. Try googling "Park Slope sucks" and then cancel your appts for the rest of the day l00zer, cause ur gonna have pages and pages of crap to sift through on the interwebs: Park Slope Food Co-op hippies this...Babies in bars! that. And yet, Park Slope has its own category on virtually all of the major nyc snark blogs: Gawker, Curbed, NY Magazine. People c-a-n-n-o-t stop talking about it. Shit that was one of the *main* reasons we started this motherfucker in the first place! We knew that the mere inclusion of PS in our blog title was pretty much the equivalent of $78.50 in internet currency (I mean, your ass is here right now, sooo....).

*Paris Hilton allegedly represents everything we're supposed to hate about celebrity and fame, and yet we love those very same things in virtually every other celeb but her - Ok, so let's break this shit down: Paris is hot? Check. Great bod? Check. Dumb? Check. Rich? Check. Well connected? Check. Been in trouble with the law? Check. Bad actress? Check Ok, good. We've just described virtually everyone in Hollywood. Moving on to Park Slope: Beautiful? Check. Good schools? Check. Variety of restaurants and shopping? Check. Tight community? Check. Parks, Trees, green shit? Check. Check. Check. Wow, sounds like an absolutely fucking horrendous neighborhood to live in. You should all feel so friggin bad for us. It's totally obvs. why everyone hates Park Slope.

*Paris Hilton is v. rich. AND, Park Slope is pretty darn rich (just ask blognigger).

*Everyone has heard of Paris Hilton...like her or not. I'm sorry, there is not a man, woman or child alive today who has never heard of this bitch. Ditto on the PS front. It's kinda shocking but true: Darren Star is doing a show based on Park Slope, celebs live in Park Slope, shit, even people who know nothin about nothin have heard of Park Slope. If Park Slope had a PR firm, they'd be sittin on a fat christ-makuh bonus right about now.

*PARis Hilton and PARk Slope. Coincidence? I think not.

Ok, so that last one might be lame, but everything else is totally legit.

Park Slope = Paris Hilton.

Try it on. Take a walk around Prospect Park with it. Doodle it on your recyclable, post consumer waste tea cup from Ozzies.

It's out there now.