Profiles In Courage: Linda The Dog Walker

I love Linda, the dog walker.

As I’ve previously noted, she’s in my pantheon of dwindling Park Slope characters (even though it turns out she lives in Bay Ridge). And no, it's not because she's a whack job--she has a big, singular personality. I consider her a character in only the nicest way. Although nothing would make me happier than to see her walking arm in arm with long lost Norma. 

I especially love the way Linda can be heard across the meadow bellowing. Specifically, I thrill at how she yells to Dude, one of her charges...and a girl, if you can believe that. Seems oddly fitting. 

So, I got my brother from another mother, Epick, to spin me a little rap to give you some Linda flav (Also, Ed wants me to mention he's doing a show with the sublime Elle King at Southpaw next Thursday, April 14 at 8pm).

Have you always been a dog walker? What were your other jobs before now? Are you secretly a PhD in French Literature?

For the past eleven years, I’ve been a dog walker. Prior to that, I was an EMT for 10 years. Actually, I am secretly a PhD in channel surfing. 

I know you drive a lot in that big van of yours (just how smelly and hairy is it, anyway?). What do you make of the drivers of Park Slope? Do you get into arguments over parking spots and stuff? Any road rage round here?

You can't even imagine how smelly and hairy my van is, especially on rainy, humid days. NO ONE is allowed in my van out of my respect for them, except my dogs. They all feel at home in the van. 

No arguments over parking since there is no parking in Park Slope. This is how I stay in shape, double-park and run before the ticket agents come. 

Road rage? Not me!! 

Why doesn’t anybody pick up dog crap when it snows? 

Why would dog owners pick up their dogs' poop when it snows...they don't pick it up any other time.

What, if anything, can you tell about people from their dogs?

Usually, I find, a dog's energy personifies its owners.  For example, if a person gets a Jack Russell for a pet, which is a very high-energy dog, usually that person is a very high-energy person. 

Are Park Slope dogs more/less spoiled or cosseted than in other hoods?

Yes I believe most dogs in Park Slope are very spoiled.

Describe the vibe of Prospect Park off-leash hours and any particularly ridonculous episodes you’ve witnessed?

99% of the time, the vibe is a lot of fun.  But every so often, it is the owners that get into it with each other, sadly over something as miniscule as one dog playing with another dog's ball/toy or a dog jumping on someone.  But this time is the dogs' time to have fun and people can sometimes ruin it. 

Are you a member of FIDO?

I am not a member of FIDO.

Do you even have a dog?

I have four: two girls, two boys. A tri-color Shih Tzu named Roxie; she’s nine.  She's a gentle girl until provoked, then all bets off because Roxie thinks she's a big dog. She's the only dog that came with her own credo: "what's mine is mine and what's yours is mine" and she makes everyone live by her rules. She's adorable. 

My second dog is a seven-year-old Lha-tese (Lhaso Apso/Maltese "designer" dog) named Libby.  She's all white with long flowing hair.  She runs the house and is DA BOSS. 

Then there is my gentle giant named Enzo, who some of you have met.  He is a 3-year old Chocolate Lab who the girls have trained since he was 10 weeks old. They run the house and give him permission to exist as part of the pack. He is sweet, loving, and gentle and never ever retaliates for the rations of shit he takes from the girls.

I recently rescued a small black and white Shih-tese (Shih Tzu/Maltese).  His name is Mikey and he’s four.  And can be a bit nasty.  But in the same breath very loving.  He’s only been with me for two weeks but has already established himself as a pack leader among the crew. He LOVES all big dogs. 

What’s your position on:

a) crate training? One of the best training tools you will ever find or need.  It keeps your dog on a schedule, keeps the dog safe from household things that could hurt or kill him, and keeps you and your new best friend best friends. I crated all three of my dogs when they were puppies, and it worked wonderfully.

b) The Dog Whisperer Cesar Millan? I like Cesar Milan. I have read a few of his books and watched his show numerous times.  And I use some of his advice for both my business and my dogs at home. 

c) puppy separation anxiety classes? In my experience, I find that a well-exercised dog produces a calm state of mind.  That is why some people have employed me. They realize their puppies/dogs have separation anxiety and after a day with me and my pack, their dog comes home tired and calm. It keeps their dogs out of the house and allows the dog to socialize and exercise with other dogs.  And puppies (starting at 4 months old) gain more confidence and learn how to take direction. 

d) yappy dogs? Yappy dogs come in all sizes.  I have a few that bless my van every day.  When people pass by my van, they all start yapping and I allow this because this time is their time.  Of course, I've purchased stock in Advil for the headaches that I have by the end of the day.  All kidding aside, for me, yappy dogs are no issue.  They are just expressing themselves. 

e) Whether or not little dogs are the meanest of the bunch? As far as little dogs being the meanest, my rescued dog is the smallest in my house and the meanest.  Within the first 5 days we had him, he nipped my girlfriend and I 4 times. Because he is a rescue and still finding his ground and settling in, we have given him a bit more longitude.  But he is also very loving.

f) sleeping with your pooch? As far as sleeping with my pooch, I have a king size bed with stairs leading up to it, so my little girls can take their corners on either side of the bed. We call them our "book ends." Our boys sleep on the floor on their pillows...which is their choice. 

What parting advice/words of wisdom would you like to give the dog owners of Park Slope?

DON'T leave your dogs tied up outside when you go into a store. Unscrupulous people look for that opportunity to steal dogs and you don't want to know what they do with them. They do NOT use them as pets. If you tie your dog to a meter and someone jumps the curb, they can easily kill your dog.  There are so many people around who would gladly hold onto your dog while you run in for a cup of coffee.

If you'd like to talk to Linda about walking your dog, you can reach her at: 917.596.5143. [ed note: We've been using Linda off and on for the past couple of years, and she rocks. Oliver loves her HARD--Erica]