Doomed Burger Joint Built on Indian Burial Ground
Benjamin | Friday, November 28, 2008 at 7:39AM 
As if you couldn't recognize this place from the photo, this is the shapeshifting burger place on the corner of 9th street and 7th ave. I was walking back from getting raped by Bank of America ATM fees, when I noticed that the awning had changed again.
What is it with this shithole that none of its slightly-different flavors can keep their doors open for more than 6 months?
First there was a mysterious closure, then big health department signs, then a few shifts of the awning without any closures at all - what the fuck!?
Now, I've made it a point to personally sample every single one of the doomed instantiations - and with the exception of 'Bar Minnow' - which really was a kick-ass bistro, this place is always exactly the same: Mediocre burgers, and shitty fries that look awesome but taste like they've been cooked in elementary school cafeteria grease from the 80's.
The food isn't what kills it though - the hallmark of the restaurants in this spot is always the same: really really shitty service. Makes Dizzy's look like Lutèce. Each time I eat at one of these restaurants the same exact situation unfolds: I end up getting stressed when the hot teen waitress abandons me either while:
* I'm trying to order for my bratty kids (miss, sorry sorry - we're not done yet - miss? (wait a sec- why the fuck am I apologizing!? ))
* We're waiting for the food
* We're waiting for the one-more-thing check-in (e.g. this is great thanks, sorry, we're still waiting for that ketchup? thank you so much! sorry!)
* Waiting to get the little-too-expensive bill.
...and each time the waitress abandonment takes place I look around and think to myself where is the manager? No, fuck that, where is the owner? Is he independently wealthy? Does he WANT to succeed? I mean, if I was ballsy and psycho enough to open the same exact restaurant in a place that KEEPS failing, I'd be watching 24/7 to make sure shit was running smooth. I'd have a 3 day staff training in Cabo to make sure that my hot little waitresses never treated my precious customers like jerkoffs.
Haven't been to the new "Flipsters" yet, but I will go soon, for the good of science.
Anyone got more info?
eats 
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Reader Comments (9)
funny stuff...
actually, i vaguely remember this place being called 'flipsters' once before...
anyone?
Just got you from Gowanus Lounge. This is solid gold!!!
funny funny shit man.
i'm pretty sure the manager is a 20-something jeans clad, filthy sneakers wearing, scruffy dude, who, unlike the waitstaff, is not required to wear the seemingly requisite tie, and does little other than tally checks at the awkwardly located register.
Got curious, so I searched on chowhound and found this one entry: http://chowhound.chow.com/topics/351857
Sounds as mediocre as ever.
In the meantime, I've totally fallen in love with 67 Burger in Fort Greene. It's da bomb. Go see a movie at BAM and eat here first: http://www.yelp.com/biz/67-burger-brooklyn
Has anyone tried SideCar on 5th Ave and 15 Street? It's AMAZING!!
Hey- I tried Sidecar based on your rec anonymous.... real good! thanx!!
this place blows just like all the previous incarnations - was dragged there by my better half and it was overpriced burgers and crap fries. Barf.
@dan - Fuck, I knew it. Thanks for the early report.
you should go to burrito bar. i'd love to hear what you have to say about them.