Yer Kid's Got No Socialsklz [TERRIBLE PARENTING 101]

Faye Rogaski thinks your kid is a brat. And frankly, other people are starting to notice, too. And you can count that Brown acceptance letter toast if little Sunshine doesn't shape up before she gets her braces off.

OK, so according to this much kinder, more socially-acceptable-than-FIPS (PUNS R FUN) Park Slope Patch article, the above isn't exactly right, but I'm taking my liberties and declaring that's pretty much the gist. Rogaski, a PR exec and adjunct professor, was disturbed enough by her students' consistent lack of decorum that she founded Socialsklz: a set of etiquette classes for kids that'll set your spawn on the fast-track to "Yes ma'am," "No, sir" and "I deeply apologize I shared that photo of my gravity bong on Facebook." 

And guess what? Modern-Day Miss Manners is a-comin' to Park Slope with a 12-week after-school class to teach your kid to stop being an asshole gently nurture within your child important communication and social skills. Sound up your alley? CLUBsocialsklz starts in September at PPW's Brooklyn Society for Ethical Culture. Leave the vowels at home.

I can't decide if this is the best or worst thing to ever hit the Slope, but if anything will make me not fear for my life every time I seem to enter the Y or C-Town during a particularly toddler-filled hour, I'm on board. (Yes, I'm calling your kid a brat. But don't take it from me; look at where I blog, for fuck's sake. Sorry, Mom and Dad.)