Whassup: So This is December Edition

by 440 Gallery artist Ella Yang

This is it, folks: December. Brace yourselves for imminent slushy shitstorms and 25 days of inescapable Christmas tunes. The good part is, you have an excuse to hit the toy store for Toys '4' Tots. (I know there's at least one bin at the Armory Y on 15th). The other good news: Park Slope can't stop, won't stop for no season. Keep having the fun with Whassup: So This is December Edition:

* Thursday, Dec. 1-Sunday, Dec. 4: Cheap Art, 440 Gallery: Nab some pretty things on the cheap at this numerically appropriate holiday sale (art from $4.40 to $440). On sale will be work from the 14 members of this local gallery. Local art, now that's a thoughtful Christmas present which will also confirm all your family's assumptions about what an insufferably crunchy place Park Slope is. Everybody wins! Hours vary by day.

* Thursday, Dec. 1: Mass Sing-a-long; DUMBO: The Chili Peppers' "Under the Bridge" is a great song to sing by yourself on a lonely Friday night as a pathetic high school kid. (I'm told.) Even (possibly) better? Belting it out in a RECOD-SETTING GROUP SING-A-LONG. Where? Get this--UNDER A BRIDGE. Specifically, the Archway under the Manhattan Bridge in DUMBO. The goal is to set the record for the most people wailing Anthony Kiedis' laments all at once. Meet at 6 pm for lyrics. The beauty starts at 6:30.

* Sunday, Dec. 4: Feather Voyeurism, Prospect Park: Hey, did you guys know you can look at birds in the park like some sort of bird pervert? Well, you can! Prospect Park hosts birdwatching walks. Take part before the winter chill kills all the birds and then they are born again from flowers in the spring. (Pretty sure that's how it works. I failed biology.) This week, you'll peep the Pine Siskin's, Orange Crowned Warbler, and the Nashville Warbler, who sings songs about unfaithful bird partners and its truck. Meet at the Audubon Center. 10am, FREE.

* Tuesday, Dec. 6: Tree Lighting, S'Nice: I hear they have a big tree somewhere in Manhattan, too, but forget that noise. Check out our own 'hood's adornment of a dead evergreen with sparkly things. Takes place in the S'Nice corner garden. A rolly polly fat man in a red suit will be there. Also, a Santa Claus impersonator. 6pm, FREE.

* Tuesday, Dec. 6: FIPS FREE Happy Hour, Union Hall: Thanks to the largesse of our search-engine overlords at Google, FIPS is getting you drunk for FREE during a holiday happy hour. FREE. DRINKS. PEOPLE. Ho, ho, fucking, ho. Also, Google NY will hand out one, free dinner for two at Thistle Hill Tavern. Take the random, freelance graphic designer you hook up with that night. 7pm-9pm, FREE.

* Thursday, Dec. 8: Party Machine Benefit, Bell House: Do you like to laugh? Do you like laugh ALL THE WAY TO THE BANK? Do you then, still laughing, like to invest funds from the bank in a worthy charitable cause? Do it, be all un-Scroogey and laugh and love life and give money to Ben Stiller's foundation, raising money for schools in Haiti. Laugh inducers include Michal Showalter and Colin Quinn -- capped off by the 80s-arrific dance party that is Slope staple Adira Amram. 8pm, $15 DOS.