V-Day Didn't Deliver? Don't Worry, This Guy Will Hook Up Your Trolling Ass [MISSED CONNECTIONS]

You, lonely single: Your Valentine's Day sucked, everyone around you was getting all snuggly 'n' shit and here you are, already having made your candy sale trips to both CVS and Duane Reade. So, where do you turn next? Missed Connections, obviously! Since that chick with the glasses reading Proust who never looked up from her book was SO checking you out, too!

OK, so I actually can't make fun of MC, because 1) it gives me pretty much all my fodder for this here blog and 2) I've been MC'd four--count 'em, four--times. And they all ruled. But there's a(n admittedly cute) dude with glasses, a Ph.D and a professorship at NYU-Poly who's taking all the sleuthing and trolling out of Missed Connections.

According to the Brooklyn Paper, Professor R. Luke DuBois created an algorithm that combs the MC databases of cities, including our fair New York, and aims to track down long lost lovers and lechers who're searching for each other. See, for you, this poses no problems, since you're just a weirdo stalking MC. For me, I get to pawn this shit off for "professional research." (Kindly let that one float out in the ether, cool?) But now Luke has reduced me to your ranks.

Thanks, Dude.

As long as we're talking Missed Connections, comment with your success stories and/or epic fails. Actually, more of the latter, because we all need a little Feb 15 schadenfreude.