This Week in WTF: Drunken Dog Fights

Do I really need to add dog ownership to my list of crazy, unlikely ways to go in Park Slope?

Because I just CANNOT believe the story of the black belt karate actor/bartender getting illkayed last week by this sorry, jowelly poodle-owning crazy man above. According to a friend, on top of being a poodle owner and a loose cannon, "Pagan is a chef who was preparing to launch a line of cooking spices."

What a way to die: trying to untangle your mini pinscher's leash from that of a felon's poodle outside a hipster hangout and accidentally brushing against fuckhead's wife, which so incenses him, he stabs you to death. (And, by the way, why did the perp only serve seven years for a prior murder?)

Hold the presses! According to Gothamist, it was a Shih Tzu, not a poodle. Even better. And in his defense, Pagan's wife told the Post, "He has slight bipolar. He couldn't focus. He has ADD. He has diabetes." 

I think we need to add to the don't take the bebe to a bar lecture, "LEAVE YOUR DOG AT HOME ON A SATURDAY NIGHT."

Also, leave your crazy bipolar, diabetic, attention-deficit-disordered felon chef (and his serrated knife) at home too!