Tenant To Children: STFU; Stuy Town, We Salute You!

Well, well, well.

Looks like Park Slope is not alone when it comes to whiny assed misbehaving children.

Our BALLER comrade over at Lux Living, a blog about life at that gigantic NYC apt megalopolis Stuy Town, received a plea from an angry resident about some gregarious, loud-mouthed kids:

"FOR WHATEVER REASON parents feel the need to get their hostile and annoying children OUT of their apartments and INTO this "playground" first thing in the morning on weekends. How do they pass the time? They scream! At each other. At the squirrels. At their parents, who mostly ignore them because they have become desensitized to how awful their children are.

Parents, nobody likes your kids. THEY ARE ONLY CUTE TO YOU. Keep them indoors, tied up, gagged, drugged, WHATEVER, and stop letting them loose at 8AM on Saturday mornings."

Some pretty sage advice if you ask me.

Anyway.

Needless to say, the post stirred quite a bit of controversy and outrage...which was only heightened by the fact that Lux posted a photo with it of some kid in the crosshairs of a rifle's scope. Oopsie! (photo was later changed to the one above). The post generate a shit ton of comments, and lots of peeps had lots of shit to say, but that's not even close to the end of it.

SOMEONE SENT THE MOTHERFUCKING POLICE OVER TO LUX'S APARTMENT! TO MAKE SURE THEY DIDN'T HAVE ANY GUNS ON HAND AND WEREN'T CRAY CRAY.

Lux explained shit to EV Grieve:

"Detectives from the 13th Precinct stopped by today to check on my lucidity and be sure there were no guns in my apartment after some tenants complained that I was inciting violence by posting an email sent to me for the "Tenant to Children: STFU!" post. They were really nice and understood the Lux Living post in question was satire but they had a job to do. After a tour of my apartment and some light conversation about my art collection and antique furniture it was clear to them that I am just a writer with a dark sense of humor and not a threat to society."

As per u, forever and always, the best stuff is in the comments of the original Lux Living post and in the clarification post that Lux put up:

"There is nobody targeting children, setting neon colored bear traps baited with mint candies and silly bandz, or razor scooter jousting taking place.

If you don't like Lux Living's sense of humor, or the sense of humor of our commenters, do us all a favor and stop reading this site. We don't go to your mommy, daddy, and baby blogs and tell you how obnoxious your kids are, we discuss and commiserate here. If you don't like it, don't read it."

Brav-to the fucking-OH.

We salute you Stuy Town! And Lux Living!

(via EV Grieve)