Dear Prospect Park,
Whadda we gotta do to get some fireworks up in this bitch!?
Look: we appreciate the fact that you guys do fireworks on New Year's Eve...only no we really don't. Cause we're all out getting drunk-n-high and we don't even notice them. Point is, when most people think fireworks, they think July 4th! Fireworks and July 4th go together like shanananana rama lama ding dong...peanut butter and jelly...Lindsay Lohan and cocaine.
And I *know* that fireworks are expensive as shit, and you probs got to get all sorts of profesh peeps to set em off and stuff, but I guess what I'm wondering (and what I would assume ALL of Brooklyn is probably wondering today) is whether maybe you'd be open to switching shit up?
Like could we mebbe trade New Year's fireworks for July 4th fireworks?
It could be like a whole big Brooklyn event!
And, yeah, I'm guessing you can't compete with the bazillion dollar fireworks show that Macy's is putting on, but who gives a rat's ass! We could turn this bitch into a whole big, bad ass BK celebration! Fuck Manhattan!
Maybe you could even do some big all day festival where diff BK food vendors could set up throughout the park...or even along PPW. We could shut that whole motherfucker down and just have an all day fun fest. And if you can't afford to go hog wild on fireworks, schedule one of the cool ass Celebrate Brooklyn Shows for that night as a prequel. Then no one will even notice that your fireworks display is wimpy.
Point is, we don't even really give a shit...we just don't want to have to get on the subway to go to Manhattan. And I'm guessing there are a lotttt of other lazy assed motherfuckers like myself that would be all over that Prospect Park fireworks shit too.
What do you think, Prospect Park? Would you bitches be down?
Love,
FIPS
[Who the fuck's with me?? If you agree, sign your leave a comment below...this thing could kinda be like our own lil petition].