The NYT Likes to Make Fun Of Coopretards Too!

Daym. If making fun of the Park Slope Food Coop is now sooo mainstream even the NYT is getting in on the action, its clearly time for us to move on. What's next? Any suggestions?

Eh, who are we kidding--we loved every fucking second of this article: Flunking Out At The Food Coop.

(And for the record, we are *still* on the hunt for a new Coop Spy).

Adrien Grenier is SO Getting His Ass Suspended From The Coop

Ok, so YES this pic is blurry. And YES, I can't quite read what it says. But according to the Park Slope Food Coop spy who sent this cell pic into Grub Street yesterday, our fave Entourage hot-tay is skipping out on his monthly shifts b-i-g time.

Not sure if the Coop makes special allowances for big time Hollywood superstars with big time Hollywood schedules, but I certainly fucking hope not.

More importantly, I'm not quite sure what to do with the information that the Coop KEEPS THEIR MOTHERFUCKING MEMBERSHIP SHIFT RECORDS ON MOTHERFUCKING INDEX CARDS!? I mean???? fjdkalfjalfjalsjfalsfjlsdjf!! If you Coopretards want, I think I have an old Commodore 64 lying around from middle school you bitches can borrow?

UNDERCOVER: PARK SLOPE FOOD COOP [FIGHT NIGHT]

Yo, we've got ourselves a real-life, ginuine, Park Slope Food Coop spy, and we're pretty fuckin stoked about it. In this brand new ongoing series, FIPS is gonna go deep into the heart of the belly of the most talked about/made fun of/loved/hated/debated Food Coop in the history of the universe. Needless to say, our spy is gonna keep things stealth anon (so as to avoid getting a hit taken out on her and/or having her membership status suspended).

So the lines suck, you have to work there, it can get crowded and disorganized, but honestly the one thing that coop members complain about more than anything, is, well, the infamously self-righteous, self-important, fascist, rule loving, humorless contingent of coopretards.

As promised in my first post, here are the details of an infuriating run-in I had with one of these insufferables.

Click to read more ...

Undercover: PARK SLOPE FOOD COOP [FAQ]

Yo, we've got ourselves a real-life, ginuine, Park Slope Food Coop spy, and we're pretty fuckin stoked about it. In this brand new ongoing series, FIPS is gonna go deep into the heart of the belly of the most talked about/made fun of/loved/hated/debated Food Coop in the history of the universe.  Needless to say, our spy is gonna keep things stealth anon (so as to avoid getting a hit taken out on her and/or having her membership status suspended).

 As far is nieghborhood institutions go, I think the Park Slope Food Coop is sort of like our own Lyndon Johnson: lots of good intentions, some good actions, and a whole mess of terrible (and I'm a member).

In order to ease into things, I thought I'd start off with some FAQ's that I get asked again and again when I reveal to people that I'm a real-life member of "the motherfucking coop," as I like to call it.

Click to read more ...