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« A Fuckit List | Main | Phucked In Park Slope: Never Forget »
Friday
Mar132009

Subway D-Bag OR Not? Exhibit #2: Old Man Hubbard

Ok, fine.

Everyone had a shit ton of opinions on whether or not its acceptable to leave an old woman OR an old man standing in the subway, while the youngins luxuriate in a seat nearby.

So you tell me: are these young hipsters D-bags?  Cause they were maxin and relaxing while this dude was standing right the fuck in front of them:

D-bags Or Not?? That is the question...

Reader Comments (18)

he's oriental, it doesn't count.

March 12, 2009 | Unregistered Commenteranon

That dude ain't so old.

March 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterChickenUnderwear

The hipsters are probably d-bags, but not solely for refusing Mr. Miyagi a seat.

Seat offerings to men occur under the following circumstances:

a) man looks older than 65
b) man is disabled
c) man asks

Chivalry is different on the subway when it comes to men - men rarely accept seats when offered because the public admission of frailty can be very immasculating.

Now, on to further evidence: Miyagi is wearing bright white sneaks, which suggests he is active and he likely doesn't mind the standing. He is also bracing himself against a wall, which most of us know, on the subway, is the second best thing to sitting. Finally, although Asians are very emotionally reserved, one can discern a faint smile on Miyagi's face: he is satisfied with his current posture.

Let us examine the environment in which this alleged douchery took place. There are two women on the bench who could potentially offer a seat to Miyagi. One woman is quite elderly, and the other is rather young. The portion of the male population who would accept a seat from either of these women is extremely small. The two women, likely having anticipated a typical male refusal to a seating solicitation, have opted not to create a potentially awkward and uncomfortable social dynamic.

Plus, Miyagi's probably getting off at Canal St. anyway.

March 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMr. Ius

@Mr. Lus: I. Love. You. Long. Time.

March 12, 2009 | Registered CommenterErica

comnnow flip on the wipers and squeege away the double dollop of ball butter, that bitch on the right is older than allah's left one.

ledder die on the train so i can breathe her air

March 12, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterhee bee

"maxin and relaxing". L O V E.

March 12, 2009 | Unregistered Commentercoolness

@ Mr. lus: Seriously. You're amazing.

I've almost offered my seat a few times recently, but then decided not to. I feel like if they look like they're not extremely old and feeble they may be offended. Also, I'm too vain for sneakers and I was wearing 3 inch heels. Them bitches can stand just fine in those velcro shoes. Along with the geriatrics, disabled and women with children I believe us stupid bitches who make poor footwear choices should be given priority.

March 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterFawnita

100% D-bizzle.

March 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLee Frank

The second best thing to sitting. Indeedy.

March 13, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterdollymibella

i've never seen anyone offer their seat to N elderly asian person, that's for sure!

i have to ask, erica, why you refer to the people in photo #1 as hipsters? i'm not really seeing it.

March 13, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMP

@MP, you're right: the dude with the matching hat/jacket (on the left) is clearly NOT a hipster. But the chick in the middle and the dude on the right were DEF hipster-ish...

March 13, 2009 | Registered CommenterErica

he doesn't look old enough for me to get up for him.

March 13, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterflynn

If you can't stand on the subway--you shouldn't ride the subway. There should be no expectation of a seat. In fact, I'd be all for it if they took the seats out. More space to do some wall-sits.

I've never given up a seat on the subway, nor would I, nor do I think people should be considered douchebags or hipsters for not getting up. If old people can't stand, they should take a taxi. If they can't afford it they should probably die and quit putting such a strain on social security and other social services.

March 13, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSteve

Whatever. I actually asked someone to move from the "priority seating for those with disabilities" seat because i was hungover. It's a disease, ya know. But double whatever to people who want to sit down. Most of them are fucking fat fucking fucks who identify with that ad about the Puerto Rican woman who had all her fingers amputated because of smoking (and probably type two diabetes). I'm not giving shit up for some fuck up with his back against a pole on a crowded F-train wearing spandex bike shorts and fingerless workout gloves, eating pork fired rice out of a Styrofoam container, listening to C&C Music factory on a transistor radio while thinking about a $400 ebay bid made on a fucking samurai sword. If i'm disabled or old and i'm still riding the train. don't give me your seat. Just kill me.

March 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterPete

Wait, is it really that big of a deal that this dude is Asian? Do we need to comment on it? I mean, yeah, we can use satire to combat racism sometimes, but I just don't fucking get how seeing Asian people is a big deal anymore. China is slowly taking over, not only the world but eventually Brooklyn too. So it just needs to be a little less remarkable when we see somebody who isn't white.

March 15, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterASIA

Agreed with Fawnita - women who wear heels should get priority seating.

March 16, 2009 | Unregistered Commentersecondbecky

I would have given him my seat in a heartbeat.

Lately, i've been looking around my F train to see all men sitting while all women are standing.
What happened to being a polite, courteous gentlemen?? Do they cease to exist???

March 16, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterD

If you are a woman and are not:

a) visibly pregnant
b) disabled
c) elderly

You should not expect a seat "just because." If you want to get a seat, be aggressive at the Jay Street or Delancey Street stops like everybody else.

Survival of the fittest, baby.

March 16, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMr. Ius

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