HELP: Girl Scout Cookies For the Rich And Childless??

UPDATE: I have located a Girl Scout Cookie source. I repeat, GIRL SCOUT COOKIES ARE IN THE HIZZY (or almost). Get thee to the Girl Scout Cookie Cupboard! Here's allllll the scoop, thanks to our friends at Blondie & Brownie.

Ok, I've gotten THREE emails about this shit in the past week or so, and quite frankly I want some answers too.

Where the christ can us BALLERS go to get our hands on some motherfucking girl scout cookies!??

I checked in with some BREEDERS, including Allison, and I was mostly directed to this Girl Scout Cookie finder website. But they ask you for all sorts of shit like your email address, your phone number, your name, etc and newsflash: I do NOT want on another goddamned email list (want my blood type too? It's O+).

Allison even tried to hook us up with a friend of hers whose kid was selling em, but their order forms went in ages ago, and now they're just waiting for all the cookies to be delivered. She's checking to see if there are extras, but: outlook not so good.

JAYZUS. SERIOUSLY?

I mean, obviously this cookie thing is working for the Girl Scouts since they've been doing it forever, but can they maybe update their friggin marketing tactics??!! Cause my guess is there are a crapload of BALLERS just like me who want cookies, have money to buy cookies, and have NEED to buy cookies after all the weed they smoke...we just don't know where to get em!

Fried cupcakes, yes; Girl Scout cookies, no.

If anyone out there has any ideas, hookups or connections, please leave a comment or get in touch...I've got a growing list of BALLERS who are counting on me to figure this shit out.