BREAKING: TARGET STRIKES BACK, TAKES IT RACIAL

You know, I really was surprised that FIPS' Atlantic Center Target exposé never earned us a formal cease-and-desist-type letter. Great move on Target's part by the way - I mean, who gives a fuck if our shitty little blog has its fun; even with our links from Consumerist et. al, only about 30k people saw those videos - On the other hand, if Target had sent us a cease-and-desist letter and made a big deal out of it, the story would have had "legs" and we'd all have ended up on Ricki Lake, metaphorically speaking.

Well, just because there are some savvy executives in the corporate offices does not mean the company doesn't have it's share of near-literate lowlifes with internet access. Check out these 1 Comment we received from a Target employee: (cashier? sales clerk? manager? How high can you make it up Target's ladder without being able to spell?)

If you knew anything about anything you would know that the Atlantic Target store is #1 in the company (1700 stores). Also I like how you certain isle but have NO idea whats going on in the departments your showing. It seems to me that you and your boy friend are 2 bored Caucasians (not a racial comment, just a comment to the people taking these video to let them know we know) and yes we know who you are LOL bet you didn't think we did huh... Good luck trying to bring this target down we are making sooo much money in 09 its ridiculous...

Oh and one more thing, why don't you tell the people that you shop and spend money at the Atlantic terminal Target. Should we post the videos of you folks checking out having a good ol time in the target you try and degrade?

Jesus christ, where do ya begin?

a) LOVE the non-racist racial reference - "you two WHITE motherfuckers...not that there's anything wrong with that."

Reminds me of my grandma asking "whatever happened to that colored girl you dated" - she's not racist OF COURSE, it's just a handy way of describing the girl I dated who most resembles her maid.

b) LOVE the surveillance threats - good to know that you've got access to security footage of every single customer, and will threaten to use them against your political enemies like Richard Nixon.

My fave is to imagine this guy posting the videos - where would he post them - on the Target corporate website?

Yo uh, boss, member those two white bitches makin the videos? I posted footage of them paying for diet coke an shit. It didn't really fit in the existing site architecture, so I added a new menu item? So now the left-nav reads "About Target | Store Locator | Investor Relations | Political Enemies | Contact Us." Coo?

c) LOVE the mob mentality that HIS (her? there I go! sexist!) Target is making BANK in 2009, yo. Who gives a shit about quality, we're cleaning up on your white asses (not racist, just lettin you know we know)

d) Finally, the most underrated portion of the guy's comment, the one substantive complaint that he levies:

Also I like how you certain isle but have NO idea whats going on in the departments your showing.

I really hope he was on crystal meth when he wrote this and was just too amped to go back and change the spelling errors and omissions - but forget all that: I've spent a lot of time trying to analyze this sentence, but I still can't grock it with certainty.

Here's my best guess:

Somehow, he is upset that we are ignorant as to a particular aisle's context within the greater departmental structure. That is our responsibility! Perhaps his point is that if we understood the processes that facilitates the restocking of a given department, we would understand why so many shelves are bare.

What do you think?

Ok, second question: What should we do with this comment? Contact Target to see if it's an official response? Go further? I'm tempted to just leave it - I have the attention span of a gnat, and all this Target shit is beyond boring already. What else is on?

Your thoughts?