BREAKING: Breaking Up Is Less Hard to Do

Happy Valentine's Day. Not to kill the current FIPS luv jones, but just got the news that divorce is back!

Yes, it's a leading economic indicator; kind of good news/bad news.

Apparently during the heyday of the recesh, breaking up was hard to do. Divorce rates actually dropped by 7% and our put-upon matrimonial lawyers were feeling the pinch. Like the Soviets before us, New Yorkers were destined to fight over the toilet seat long after the thrill was gone.

But now that the economy's doing better—WOOHOO! Miserably married Park Slopers can safely divide our assets and head on down to Duane Reade to buy Russell Stover candy hearts and celebrate.

I've done some exhaustive research, and it appears that the divorce rate in Park Slope is really, really low. I know hardly anybody who has gotten one since we moved here 14 years ago. I mean: that's weird, right? Especially compared to the contagion going around during my childhood when seemingly NO NYC kid's parents were still together.

So WTF is up here?

One friend just told me she'd caught her husband getting a little something on the side,  and was staying even though her 5th grader was mad at her for being such a doormat. And the one friend who DID dump her dude had discovered that he accidentally pasted the text of his booty call email into a document on their shared home computer. Oops.

Do Park Slopers divorce less? And if so, why?? Is it because:

a) we still can't afford two apartments and are stuck ad infinitum in Soviet style marriages?

b) we are older and schlubbier when we marry, college educated and statistically less likely to get divorced?

c) we know how to keep those embers burning a la all those nauseating tales of togetherness FIPS just featured?

d) we are all fucking around on our spouses and just weirdly okay with it? 

e) we don't believe in divorces because our parents generation had so many?

I don't friggin know. What do you think?