Bedbug Terrorism...Shit Just Got REAL

By the time you read this I may have very well strapped some concrete blocks to my ankles, and jumped off the side of the Brooklyn Bridge into the rough (ish), icy (ish) waters of the East River to end it all. Cause quite frankly, I don't know how the fuck I can go on with my day knowing that aside from worrying about getting bedbugs:

• on the subway
• at the movies
• at high-end retail stores
• at your office
• AND EVERY OTHER MOTHERFUCKING PLACE ON PLANET EARTH

Now I gotta worry about Bedbug terrorism!???? On craigslist?? AYFKMWTS!?

Some stupid motherfucking, cocksucking sonofabitch recently placed the following ad:

Free Bed Bugs/ Good Sabotage, Revenge (Midtown)

Do you hate your roommate and are moving out? Leave a fantastic goodbye present. Nothing says ‘Eff You!’ like some BEDBUGS. I have bedbugs safely stored in jars for the perfect sabotage. Free of charge, will meet anywhere. 

Ok, fine: who knows if this person is full of shit or not, but evenso: the whole idea of this just puts me at a code red level 9 suicide watch.

Do they have bedbugs in Canada? Alaska? Hawaii?? WHERE CAN I GOOOOOO????

(via Brick Underground)