Whassup: Brave the Snow Edition

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There continues to be just all of the snow dropping on NYC lately. And such weather might activate your hibernating instincts. I mean, they make soup for hipsters now, so why even go out? Just stay at home, while the steam from your Moroccan-style chicken soup (with chickpeas!) fogs your thick-rimmed eyewear. Just nest, you know? Understandable, and we here at FiPS are never ones to badmouth laziness, but yet there remain fun things to be done that exist outside of your apartment. Welcome to Whassup: Brave the Snow Edition:

* Friday, March 8: MJ & Madonna Sing-Along, Union Hall: I don't know what it's like for you young things who didn't grow up in the '80's, but for your elders, Michael Jackson and Madonna songs are as anthemic as it gets. That shit is bubble-gum scripture. The opening strains of "Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough" or "Like a Prayer" will illicit Pavlovian responses. But, regardless of your generation, that stuff is pop gold. And the concept of the Sing-Along is simple, in case you're not familiar: the whole crowd does karaoke together. Basically. It's a particularly fun thing to do for the tuneless, because nobody can tell how terrible you are. 9:30pm, $8. 

* Saturday, March 9: Big Lebowski '90s Party, Bell House: If you're male and went to college in the 2000s, it's likely you can quote an embarrassing amount of lines from "The Big Lebowski." The movie actually came out in 1999, though, which makes it a perfect theme for "Party Like It's 1999," the regular '90's DJ party at the Bell House. So, mostly, this is going to be like any other "Party Like It's 1999" event, except you can win free drinks for Lebowski costumes. And probably there'll be White Russian specials. And maybe some Credence. 10pm, FREE. 

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Whassup: (February's) Too Short Edition

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Perhaps it's appropriate that the month purported to celebrate romance seems to end so prematurely. It happens to everyone sometimes, February. Don't even worry about it. Seriously, we don't even care that it's over already. But when the month ends on the 28th, it does seem to slam things shut in a hurry. Another year one-sixth over already. Don't let any more time waste, you guys -- get out there and live. Welcome to Whassup: (February's) Too Short Edition:

* Daily: Wine Tastings, Big Nose Full Body: Nothing eases the pain and anxiety of the passage of time, or the pain and anxiety of anything really, quite like alcohol. And with a wine tasting, you can feel both sophisticated AND numb. Best of both worlds. Big Nose Full Body, the South Slope wine shop, has begun daily wine tastings. So, that's just awesome. 5pm-7pm.

* Thursday, Feb. 28: Darwinian Variety Show, House of Yes (Williamsburg): What does a cabaret, variety show have to do with Charles Darwin, you might ask? Well, for starters, the naturalist was also a noted fire eater and burlesque aficionado. Now, neither of those things are true, but they are weird and kind of intriguing thoughts, which also describes this menagerie of circus acts in Williamsburg. 9pm, $15. 

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Whassup: Reddish Carpet Edition

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As the Oscars sneak up, be-glittered, upon us, take a good look at the beautiful, successful people who will still be able to afford living in Park Slope long after all of us have been priced out. They will join Captain Picard, Donny Kerabratsos and PC in watching your sad retreat to Queens or Hipsturbia. Meanwhile, snark all over their self-congratulatory fashion show. It's a sort of pre-revenge, which is sometimes the best you can manage. Welcome to Whassup: Reddish Carpet Edition: 

* Thursday, Feb. 21: Printmaking Residency Closing, Gowanus Studio Space: The 2012 printmaking residents at Gowanus Studio Space are on their way out. Because, if you hadn't heard, 2012 was killed on Dec. 31. Sad. No one saw it coming. (Everyone saw it coming.) Come check out what images look like when they are not composed of glowing pixels, as the practitioners of this old-school medium host their closing show. 7pm-9pm, FREE. 

* Thursday, Feb. 21: New Book Lair, Mellow Pages (Bushwick): A couple of libro-loving book bros from the PacNW (Seattle, if you're counting) are opening a cool thing tonight: it's an indie library stocked with works from indie presses, largely from their own collections. BECAUSE PAPER IS STILL A THING, YOU KINDLE-HAVING FUCKERS! Sorry. There'll be beer to drink, and readings to ignore while you drink. Really, it's just such a Brooklyn thing that you should do it. 7pm, FREE (can buy $20 membership).

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Whassup: Post V-Day Relaxation Edition

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Today's the day. The big, stupid, Hallmark-created day. So if you haven't lined up Valentine's plans by now, let's be honest, you're kinda fucked. Unless you just want to take your sweetie for a romantic walk in the park. In February. But, who cares? With Cupid in the rear-view, we can all finally enjoy ourselves sans the pressure of creating a perfect, romantic night. In fact, the only thing you need to romance for most of these events is your beer. Welcome to Whassup: Post V-Day Relaxation Edition:

* Thusday, Feb. 14: Cringe, Freddy's: Ok, I lied. (It's what I like to do, in general, on Valentine's Day.) Because I do have one V-Day event for you (reprised from last week, because it's too perfect). This one's even ok for last minute plans because it's free and there are no tickets. Just show up (early-ish, to find space), and listen to some mortifying teenage diaries. The Valentine's edition should be extra rich with melodrama, embarrassment, heartbroken curses and hear-rending pining. 7:30pm, FREE.

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Whassup: Cupid-Proof Edition

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Oh, awesome. So, yeah, awesome. It's the awesomest holiday of the year this week: Valentine's Day. I don't think I know anyone who actually likes this holiday. If there are such people, I hope I never date any of them. For the rest of us (sane) people, Valentine's Day may only be enjoyed oppositionally and/or ironically. Hence, you'll find, closing out this esteemed edition of Whassup, a series of V-Day activities that even the most woefully single of us may enjoy. Welcome to Whassup: Cupid-Proof Edition:

* Saturday, Feb. 9: Vintage Vogue & Vinyl, Union Hall: If you're a young person living in Brooklyn, there's a good chance you like old things -- I'm sorry, vintage things. It's as reliable as non-hip people liking new things and things that Michael Bay has made. Therefore, you will probably like this vintage clothing and record party thrown by Out of My Mind vintage. To go along with your new, old duds, there'll be '60s and '70s-style makeovers to be had, along with some old, vinyl-heavy DJing to dance to like an old woman. 1-5pm, FREE.

* Sunday, Feb. 10: Vegan Bake-Off, Bell House: A vegan bake-off is appropriate for a month with Valentine's in it as we all try to be as different as possible from THE PERSON WHO ATE OUR HEARTS!! No, but, really: here's a blood-thirsty competition that is not actually thirsty for any blood. You get the point: delicious things that involve nothing with parents. It's comfort food for your stomach and your soul. 3pm, $12.

* Sunday, Feb. 10: Babeland Sexy Trivia, Pacific Standard: Valentine's Day is supposed to be all about romance, which is, strictly speaking, not the same thing as sex. But, if you're doing either one right, hopefully there's some overlap. Anyway, those heart-shaped boxes full of chocolate oughtta be worth at least one night of messing up the sheets. Failing that, come get titillated by some sexy trivia at Pacific Standard, hosted by the healthy sexualities from Babeland. 8pm-11pm, FREE. 

* Tuesday, Feb. 12: Whiskey Coke Reading, Freddy's: The young-punk writer/musicians of 'Having a Whiskey Coke with You' return, with the make-shift community of artists well past a year of reading, performing, drinking and smoking together. You can join just to listen or to join in during the open mic in the wee hours. 8pm, FREE.

* VALENTINE'S DAY: Cringe, Freddy's: This Valentine's Day, there's no better way to celebrate the embarrassment of intimacy than with mortifying and hilarious readings from teenage journals, love poems, breakup tirades and more. And that's what Cringe is for. 7:30pm, FREE.

* VALENTINE'S DAY: Rejection Show, Littlefield: Unless, is it that there's no better way to celebrate Valentine's than by acknowledging the bone-shaking rejection we all must feel at some point. This comedy shindig explores rejection, particularly that of the heartbreak variety for this V-Day show. 8:30pm, $10-12. 

* VALENTINE'S DAY: 'Unloveabe' Smiths Tribute, Bell House: Unless, that is, there's no better way to celebrate Valentine's Day than with the desperately lonely melodies of The Smiths and Morrissey, brought to you by local Smiths and Morrissey cover band, The Sons & Heirs.  9pm, $12. 

* VALENTINE'S DAY: Power Ballads Sing-Along, Union Hall: UNLESS, that is, there's no better way to celebrate Valentine's Day than by crooning along to the heartbreakingly overdramatic strains of the '80s' hair-metaly-est power ballads. Feel the love coursing through you like the heroin through Axl Rose's veins.  9:30pm, $8.