WHASSUP: Rando Edition

What the fuck is with this weather? Where is Spring? Last week I had the flu. This week I'm drenched. I'm not having it, NYC. My only defense is this lineup of choice offerings designed to take your minds off the miserably cold deluge that's visiting.

This week I've curated some real winners for you to take in and enjoy. Your assignment, if you choose to accept it, is to go to at least one of these Godforsaken events and tell me about it. Leave a comment, send us an email, use the pony fucking express. I don't care.

So, WHASSUP? Damn, you're pushy:

Thursday, 5/1, RENT, The Gallery Players: RENT was the angst-driven, alternative anthem of the late 90’s. If you didn’t have the pleasure of seeing its Broadway turn, or the movie (and I use that term loosely) be sure to check out the Gallery Players. This hidden gem on 14^th has has hosted some serious talent—including yours truly. I'll be reviewing this show in case you need my brilliant rundown before you commit. Adults $18, Seniors/Children $14, 8pm

Friday, 5/2, The Cat’s Meow: A Cheetah Print Prom Party Fundraiser: I choose not to remember prom—the paisley cummerbunds, awkward photos, my untimely butt cut. Perhaps the cheetah print madness will shine new light on the obligatory dance of yesteryear. $5-$20, 8:30pm doors, 9pm show

Saturday, 5/3- The Amazing Brooklyn Scavenger Hunt, Fort Greene: I fucking love Fort Greene.  Everytime I’m there I make a new discovery, take in a boozy brunch, or visit the Nets. Combine that magic with a scavenger hunt and you’ve stumbled on perfection. $30, 12:30pm-3:30pm

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New Park Slope Yahoo Group on the Scene

A few weeks ago, I saw this item on the digest I get from the Prospect Heights Parents Yahoo Group. Intriguing! Quite obviously, some folks have started this Park Slope Neighborhood Exchange for people who don't want to pay to be members of Park Slope Parents. Brazilliant idea! Unfortunately, it seems I'm not good enough for them:

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Percy's Pizza Bites the Dust

Image via Park Slope Stoop

If you happened to be walking near 1st Street and 7th Avenue yesterday just after 12pm yesterday, you might have noticed groups of 4th graders from 321 weeping in the streets at the news that their beloved Percy's (a.k.a. South Brooklyn Pizza's Park Slope outpost) had shut down. No more dollar slices, kids! Back to the long lines at Pino's for you! Okay, fine, weeping in the streets might be a bit of an exaggeration, but according to one nine year old who spoke to FIPS under the condition of anonymity, "A lot of people flipped out because they really like Percy's."

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[What I Will Order At] Berg’n: Future Fatty Edition

Image via Facebook.com/bergnbeerhall.comReports from the Park Slope periphery have our salivary glands on overdrive.  What’s got us all worked into a lather?  It’s Berg’n – the latest and greatest beer hall offering that has us feeling full just imagining the delicious possibilities. Smorgasburg and Brooklyn Flea's finest fare, teamed up with craft beers, in a conspiracy to get us all running loops in Prospect Park. Suddenly, we have some very serious new decisions to make:

Pizza Moto’s Casino pizza - cream, clams, white wine, bacon, breadcrumbs, lemon, fresh herbs (seasonal)?  Or another Brooklyn Sorachi Ace?

Mighty Quinn’s spare ribs and burnt-end baked beans?  Or another Firestone Walker Union Jack?

Asia Dog’s fried-chicken sandwich topped with wasabi slaw and honey-miso mustard or pickled celery, carrot, homemade wing sauce and blue cheese?  Or another Captain Lawrence Liquid Gold?

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Pussy Claims To Be “The Queen Of Park Slope!”

There are some cool ass bodega cats making the rounds on Facebook and the like, thanks to WNYC. Seems like at least one of the CABCs (cool ass bodega cats) is from Park Slope. Sheba, the black and white twelve year old cat-in-residence declares herself The Queen of Park Slope in the sweet and funny Bodega Cats in Their Own Words

I hate aggressive dogs. Some dogs have that animosity towards me.  Maybe it’s because I’m the Queen of Park Slope but I will never settle for anything less and I’m holding that title forever.

Any of the cats in the video marked their territory on your pant leg or coughed up a hairball on your clog? Can you make out any of the voices? They are voiced by the actual bodega owners! Do you know which Park Slope establishment Sheba resides in?

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