The Cabinet Shop Takes The Don Rickles Approach: Insult Your Customers!
Benjamin | Thursday, December 11, 2008 at 6:50AM 
I've never actually been inside The Cabinet Shop, or known anyone who has, but I'm sure they carry the finest in hand made, locally grown, organically-certified expensive shit.
What I have seen though, along with thousands of other Park Slope residents, is this beyond-retarded sign that they have posted on their front-door:
Listen: People acting like dumbshits with their cellphones is old news. Every day, each one of us witnesses 10 etiquette-impaired phone-abusers that deserve a punch in the dick. Yeah, the thought of someone wandering around an intimate, expensive store like The Cabinet Shop is enough to make you cringe and hope it's not your wife. However, the wording and placement of this sign is more offensive, arrogant, and detrimental to business than having five Jersey JAPs hold a conference call next to the oak armoires.
How bout a fuckin sign that says "no cell phones please."
Doesn't that get the same point across? Wouldn't that be less:
- Sarcastic
- Rude
- Presumptive
- Insulting
- Obnoxious
Qualities that, unless you're Don Rickles, don't normally achieve high yields in the practice of New Business Development?
retail 
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