Park Slope Craigslist Blotter

SEEKING: A Writer For The End Of The World

Somebody is working on their memoirs and is looking to workshop it with another writing working on a similar project. I actually think this is cool and it's always helpful to have somebody go over your stuff. However, I'd kind of want to know and trust them. Some random stranger might have terrible taste.

FOR SALE: Expensive Couch

I know somebody who had this exact couch. It wasn't very comfortable to sit on. It also took up a healthy amount of space. And nobody was allowed to sleep on it. Turns out it costs $2800. Huh. If you're spending that much money on something for the living area that you can't sit on or change the channel on then it should probably be wall art. We live in apartments, this is insane.

FOR SALE: Stenographer kit

Stenographer is one of those jobs that is a complete mystery to me. For starters how is there not some robot doing it yet? It seems like a job for a mindless machine. Do they get paid well? This post gives me my first crack into the world of stenographers. That little piece of equipment is way expensive. It costs more than a laptop, even though it seems to have the some processing power as a typewriter. We get a close up of the keyboard, too, and I think I'd feel the same way if I was at the controls of an alien spaceship. It's very much a "What the fuck?" situation.

JOB AVAILABLE: Real estate agent

Unemployed? Talk a lot? Don't mind going up a lot of stairs? This might be your calling. I've had two real estate agents. One sweated a lot. Like, constant sweating, it was terrible. I stopped in the middle of a day of searching to get him water. I was worried he'd pass out from dehydration. The other agent was a friend of a friend who I wanted to hook up with and then ended up charging me the entire fee and stopped answering my texts. That apartment had rats too. Oh well.

MISSED CONNECTION: The Last Picture Show To Jack Off To

The Cobble Hill Cinema has $8 showings on Tuesday and Thursdays. However, up the road at the Court Street movie theater you can walk into the bathroom, start jerking off into a urinal and have the guy next to you finish you off. Man, I love Craigslist sometimes.

MISSED CONNECTION: Tennis lady

Ugh. I hate all the other missed connections. Although what could possibly follow a bathroom hook up at a local movie theater? Man sees lady waiting for subway. Man likes lady. Man says nothing. Man goes home and immediately types up Craigslist post.  Pretty standard Missed Connection. Click it if you feel like seeing what I filter out every week.