Park Slope Craigslist Blotter
Jim | Friday, January 24, 2014 at 7:30AM 
This fireman took Marie out three times in November and then never heard from her again. I'm guessing he met her online. I'd love to hear what happened on these dates. You'd think they must have gone horribly and she either deleted her profile or blocked him. But how bad could they really have been if she went on the third one? Look for a possible follow up correspondence to this post in next week's blotter. We've got questions that need answering.
MISSED CONNECTION: Starfucks? Sexbucks?
Neither of those joke headlines worked really. This 44 year old man thought another man was looking his way. He was too shy to say anything though. I find a lot of these missed connections are gay men. Maybe it's because it's hard to approach a dude without knowing if he's gay. How can you even tell? I wear sweaters and skull caps too and I'm not gay. Although if I guy approached me I wouldn't be weirded out. I don't know. Food for thought.
Recently a girl changed her mind about going out with me after reading the foul language I use in these Craigslist blotters. It's really made me rethink…absolutely nothing. This post is about two people who met while subway surfing. Is it a fake post? I don't know. They do have those signs. However, I have never seen or heard of anybody surfing on a subway. I hope it's true and they find each other and get married. That would be a hilarious story for their grandchildren to tell.
Our Missed Connections poet is back. And he's rapping about… I don't know. Weird sexual stuff. This is his most accessible piece yet though. And probably the only one you'll be comfortable reading at work.
Free vitamins yo! I don't recognize any of this stuff. Maybe it's some kind of holistic thing. I think putting what they are in parenthesis would help. Like when you order Indian food online. Which one of these bad boys is going to get my D hard? Not that I need it, bro. I'm fully torqued right now.
Do you like mason jars? You live in Brooklyn, dummy, of course you like mason jars. Christine is looking to clear some space and she's unloading over 250 of them. No word yet on whether a professional organizer will be there to supervise.
This might be the first barter we've addressed here in the blotter. It's an interesting deal though. Handyman is seeking a laptop and willing to exchange his services for it. He's offering painting, electrical work and plumbing. All really good stuff. My laptop is a piece so I'm willing to do the same. All I can do is write though. So if you want to get a head start on an obituary or a Craigslist ad let me know. I can do love letters too. I've got a Draft folder full of them on my G-mail right now.
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