I NEED ANSWERS: WHY DOES THE BROOKLYN PUBLIC LIBRARY LITERALLY STINK?

Jobs, healthcare, babies in bars?  No, the real question on tap: why does the entire main branch of the Brooklyn Public Library (at Grand Army) smell like body odor?

I'm usually a cafe-dweller when I'm writing (read: sitting on FIPS while I leech wireless), but when my ass is really on deadline, I revert to my old overachiever college habits and slam into the library.  Last weekend, I took fifty nearly straight hours finishing the edits on my first novel, and spent easily twelve hours in the BPL.

But reaaaally, I actually spent twelve hours holding my breath.  Screw finding a plug for my laptop--does someone want to explain to me why I had to weave through six million sections just to try to find a place that didn't make me gag?  I know that shit wasn't me.  I showered, okay?  I wear freaking Chanel perfume.

The worst section, hands down, has to be the Philosophy section.  I had to cover my face and run, people. What is this?  Don't you "freelancers" and "students" have enough time on your hands to like, jump in some hot running water?  Have the organic food nazis started boycotting soap, too?  Cuhlearly I'm missing something here, because I thought smelling like a presentable human was normal life protocol.

Enlighten me, Park Slope.  And I will point you in the direction of a fragrant bath bar in return.